The Relationship Chat

Watching Television with my 15-year-old daughter can be an app-flipping nightmare. I have been blessed in that she doesn't like to watch a lot of empty TV. I don't know how to explain what empty TV is other than, while she is watching something I start to tune in and not want to turn the channel.

Most nights during wind-down she asks me to watch television with her or just talk. If I am not working on market stuff and even if I am, I will make time for her. Since most shows are sexualized and lifestyle-driven in ways she does not identify with. I had to find something that we could look at without changing the channel because people are hitting positions that are just not appropriate for our together time.

What could we watch together that would spark conversation, because she likes to talk during any movie? Note to her future partner. Good thing, because so do I. My husband does not. He prefers to fall asleep. I love Hallmark movies, especially Christmas specials and right now it is Christmas in July and there are movies playing all day starting at 10 am. Not that I am stalking them, but I really do enjoy them.

I began watching a few movies and little by little my daughter joined me for the Christmas movies, mysteries, and regular family stories. It is great that she and I get to talk about all of the things happening on screen. Then one day she asked me a question and a light bulb went off like a firecracker! I could use these movies as a chance to talk about relationships and my daughter was all for it.

She recently asked me why a young lady didn't see that she was receiving support from those around her when she wanted support. I told her in this case, when a person is the baby or only girl, in a very protective family. The family wants to keep her close. So, she had to fight for her independence. In the thralls of fighting she cannot see that if she made the decision to stand up for herself and be honest with her family, that she would feel supported in her endeavors.

The character in the movie found it hard to move forward and allow love into her life because she was always blinded by her ambition to prove herself independent. My daughter understood and when we watched another show she spotted some situations and pointed them out to me.

Now, I do not know if this method is good for anyone else, but it is working for the week and a half since we started. I decided to share because I understand that some have a difficult time talking to their teens. I spend a lot of time with my children because it is a part of my purpose. I tend to study them. I want to be the teacher they need and if there is something my husband or I don't know, then we will do whatever we can to get them the information in the way they can understand it. Then a situation will come along where they practice it, it always happens that way, miraculously.

Time can be a thief if you let it or a stopwatch to enjoy all the little things that some seem to regret they didn't do enough of. I know not everyone's cup of coffee is jet black or light brown like mine. But whatever you like, make sure you enjoy the whole cup and not the half cup because you are trying to make it somewhere in a hurry.

I don't know where that came from but it was for someone and I hope you find a way to communicate your university in a way your students will engage and enjoy!

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