ⅅℯ𝑎𝚛e𝖘𝖙 𝙻𝗚𝜝𝕋ⵕ𝙰Ꞵℂ𝚾𝚈𝗭𝖦8𝒱𝚻ꓑʟ𐌑+ Ｙ૦𝝊𝐭𝗁, (part one)

For true change to occur, it is said that we must either go very far down a path of intense suffering (to find life’s truths waiting at the end of that arduous journey - when you will be in such a state of exhaustion and depletion that you have no choice but to change) or you must hear them from someone who you truly trust and who inspires you to change.

The latter is so rare - for trust is no simple happening. Trust requires many cooperative components and every single one of those components is absolutely necessary. And they also must come together at the same time.

You must be able to trust that the person is indeed wise enough to be correct. Then you must trust that they are like you (usually having overcome similar or worse struggles than yours).

How often have you been given advice and disregarded it because you think that person could not possibly relate to your struggles and therefore their advice can’t possibly apply to you?

Above all, you must trust that this person has only your highest good in mind and only purely loving, honest and genuine intentions.

All are impossible to prove.

I want to begin by acknowledging that I have perhaps not inspired trust by the title of this letter. My opening jest may well be triggering to some who take it as I am mocking the community. It’s possible. Probable, in fact.

So why did I do that?

Many reasons….

One of which being….

I am not responsible for the misinterpretation of it, nor am I responsible for the reactions of others.

And I think that’s a great lesson to share with you in and of itself.

I am absolutely not mocking the community - I am mocking the idea that you could possibly be defined by any set of letters or words. The more letters I see added to this community over the years, the more absurd the concept of it grows. Because it is a never ending path to nowhere that has been started by an insistence for representation through a word /letter.

I am making light of this entire charade of labelling yourself as anything.

I wrote a poem on this topic a while back (linked below for anyone curious enough to further explore what I trying to convey - the message is fully condensed into this short poem).

Back already?

Cool.

In short, you are far too complex and unique and wonderful and incredible to fit into any tickbox checklist nonsense that tries to define you as just one thing based upon your PRESENT DAY gender identity or sexual preferences - both of which can absolutely alter and evolve as you alter and evolve through life.

You will learn as you grow that life has a funny way of proving us wrong each and every time we decide anything as being certain and forever anyway!

Fighting so hard to be defined and accepted by others in a way that suits your present day self is such a waste of your precious energy. A ridiculous waste.

The only acceptance you actually, truly need is your own. From every part of you.

You don’t need to convince the people of the world to accept you. Many of them NEVER will anyway (whether it’s because you are queer, a woman, a man, white, black, uneducated, educated, support this sports team instead of that one, dress too casually, dress too fancy etc etc).

You must understand and accept that this is how it is in the world.

Every. Single. Person. on this earth experiences discrimination and bullying in different ways for different reasons and we are all programmed to believe our struggles are harder than other peoples. This is known as a victim mindset.

Want a really quick way to snap out of it and awaken? This is a great place to start;

Don’t fall into the game of attaching to a victim story about your particular trauma and the particular way you are discriminated against… just do what is needed within you to overcome it.

It’s part of the deal of being alive in a world that isn’t the utopian Garden of Eden. Accept this quickly and you will suffer far, far less. Most people don’t because they can’t. They need the world to validate who they are… or what happened to them. Don’t wait for that, for you could be waiting decades. Decades during which you could have been enjoying your life.

(It is worth also considering that things on this earth may never change. You may never find the validation and acceptance you crave outside of you. Which means… it is imperative you do that for yourself and find ways to be joyful in spite of the fear and hate which exists in the world. From your joy you will change more than you can fathom right now. You will change far more through love than through anger or outrage or fighting others to change or expand their minds. Stop seeking love from loveless people. Stop seeking acceptance from people who don’t accept themselves. Stop trying to change others. Full stop. Change yourself. It’s the only person you can change. You get me?)

You actually just need to become such a light of love and joy that others simply cannot keep away from you.

Those same people will also protect you from harm. And the wrong people will be so repelled by your lightness that they will find it (literally) impossible to remain in your presence. Trust me on this.

You are a being of a billion parts. Or more like 8 billion human parts.

Inside each and every one of us is a part that is attracted to and capable of loving every single other human being on this planet.

Because (ultimate truth) they all are you.

They are you in different skin. Born to different parts of the earth. To different parents. To different challenges and traumas, joys and celebrations. To different privilege and poverties. To different faces and names and talents and abilities. To different cultures and programming. To different oppressions and freedoms.

All doing their very best to navigate this crazy existence.

Every single person who exists IS you.

Which of course includes me.

I’m your older, wiser self… writing to you from a different body on a different timeline. The self who who put in the decades of commitment to the studies of love, life, relationships and health.

And I have so much to share. The things I have to impart to you can truly transform your life from a mediocre mortal human existence of blah to a magic filled Godly one.

But there is only so much I can type today 😉 and it’s not for me to take you all the way. You are your own best life guide. All I hope to do is to spark your curiosity and to re-focus your attention to the areas of your life that truly matter.

Those areas which will empower you (and therefore empower everyone around you and create a better world).

When we call ourselves queer, heterosexual, male, female, non binary, etc we are trying to convey to people that the majority of our parts fit that label. We give allowance to those parts of us. Those are the parts that are mostly running the show.

But does that label describe you? Of course not. When you learn who you truly are, you will also be laughing at the idea that you could be somehow defined correctly by some English word.

Why are there so many letters attached to this community? Because 4 letters were obviously not enough to describe millions of people each encasing 8 billion parts. Let me cut to the punchline. There aren’t enough letters or words in existence that can or would accurately describe even one part of you.

And that’s just talking about who those parts are today. You will constantly grow and evolve and change through your learnings and life. Don’t ever try to box your tomorrow into anything. You can be whoever you choose in each moment of each day. You can change preferences.

For one small example, in my teens I was convinced I would never feel like a woman because I am flat chested. I almost got breast implants to ‘fix’ what was actually an internal confidence, self esteem and major attachment issue problem. It took a decade of internal work, but as I look back today, I am beyond grateful that I did not mutilate my body and instead chose the harder path.

Today you may decide to love women and exclusively women - yet tomorrow (which is entirely unknown) you may meet a man who opens up closed parts of your heart and has you suddenly realising that love is something that cannot and should not be limited or restricted by you to just one category of people, for example.

Love, true love, has no boundaries whatsoever. It does not see sex, or race, or gender. It doesn’t look at clothing or make up or hobbies. It doesn’t care for whatever fluff or decorations you wrap yourself in. It doesn’t see poverty or wealth. Or anything that can be put into words.

True love comes from the depths of the soul.

It cannot be created nor destroyed. Once felt it cannot be unfelt. It cannot be undone. Love requires certain conditions to arise. Conditions which can be created.

It requires health. It requires a foundation of peace. It requires virtue and truth. It requires safety. Emotional safety, physical safety, spiritual safety, mental safety.

It is a frequency that we first work to attain and sustain alone. We must create the conditions within our own body, mind and heart for the soul to shine through. For true love to rise in us.

Contrary to popular myth, true love is not something you fall into accidentally. You rise into love. Deliberately. Consciously. Purposefully.

You fall into attachments.

Attachment based relationships are what our modern society calls love. But they are not love. They are far, far removed from love.

You must learn the difference between love and attachment if you are seeking happiness.

That is not to say that there cannot be loving experiences or moments within attachments, for there absolutely can be. But you must know that this temporary good feeling is neither sustainable nor is it true love.

Attachment and desire born from need or lack are commonplace and typical. You will find examples literally everywhere around you. These are not your role models. If you ‘need’ the other person, you are not capable of gifting them perfect truth and perfect freedom. Which are both prerequisites for true love.

To love truly and without attachment is not something you can click your heels together three times and simply do. It takes a monumental amount of work and effort to become even close to capable of loving others truly. It takes for victoriously battling every demon within you. It takes overcoming every addictive, compulsive, unconscious behaviour you are in the habit of repeating.

It is the single hardest journey you will ever attempt. It will require every ounce of courage and compassion and commitment and patience that you can muster and then it will ask for double that amount.

And because you have no role models to copy - it also requires an immense amount of faith. It’s not an easy sell really! But know this. You will never sustain feeling truly content, joyful or fulfilled on any other path.

Every other path is either a long winding, slow path of suffering with some occasional peaks and highs, or a fast downhill plummet that will feel great until you crash land at the bottom. Which is also a whole world of suffering. Just incase I’m not making this absolutely clear!

The choice is entirely yours.

Deeply planted within every single one of us is the knowing of true love. However, if we are poisoning our bodies (alcohol, intoxicants, animal flesh / bodily fluids, being around low vibe angry, bitter, jealous people etc) that seed will only ever remain a buried seed. Easy to forget about. Easy to ignore. Never growing.

If, however, we care to create the conditions to grow this deepest inner wisdom and knowing… to allow that seed to sprout… we are capable of living in perpetual lightness and joy. We can become the very love we seek.

Which leads me onto the next truth we should discuss….

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Inspired by the challenge below. But really? This is what I would tell my little sisters, and every young person growing up in this world ❤️🌟🫶🏻