suppose unbelonging had a color
a wrongful grayish hue
with half the value night falls under:
.
dark dim horizoned star in wonder
of an elusive whitelight moon,
unbelonging might be a color
.
shaded bad like clouds that thunder
in crayon boxes, skirting blues,
with half the value night falls under
.
missable beside “cornflower,”
called “notenough” or “leadballoon,”
‘cause if unbelonging was a color
.
it’d be named worse than all the others
and clash each time you drew
with half the value night falls under.
.
but whenever you felt strange, asunder
you’d plainly see I’m painted too
with unbelonging as a color,
half the value night falls under.
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Comments (11)
Really amazing! Congrats on placing.
Congratulations ! A thoughtfully written piece.
Congratulations, Morgana! This was simply divine. I read it first then listened to the audio reading. It completely blew the first reading off the charts for me. I may have to try this because hearing the words read out loud gave it a deeper feel! Well done, indeed!
I ejnoyed the varations on the first line as this progressed! Beautifully penned and read! Congratulations on placing!
Very insightful! Congrats
Congrats! Such cleverly crafted lines and a brilliant concept! I was in awe!
Back to say, congrats on placing!
Goodness. Not sure how I missed this. Glorious. Congratulations. 🥰
I love this, Morgan, especially as you've adapted the villanelle form by referencing rather than repeating the first line. I'm not sure it will qualify for the challenge, but I really do like it this way. (Not to mention, what a voice! Thank you for reading it for us.)
Your voice 🤯 Goodness! Simply gorgeous! This is an incredible masterpiece of a villanelle… I’m smitten. The flow and rhythm are perfect–the way each word rolls so beautifully when read out loud, and the incredible message. Beautiful work! Missed you around here! 💫💞
Oh my...your voice. This is an awesome piece. Loved it and the added dimension of your voice brought it to life. I have a slight editorial thing...that I won't say unless you say it's okay...don't wanna be "that guy" in an unsolicited way. lol.