satire
Relationship satire can be cathartic; when love hurts too much, just laugh.
Pedestrians Can Be Jerks When Crossing the Street
Sorry, but I have to get this off my chest. I hate it when people walk across the street and take their sweet time doing it. This trend only seems to persist in busy parts of big cities. I know that some of you are probably thinking bad of me, but this trend is too much! Really, these people cross the street all the time and hold up cars just because it's their right to cross the street.
By Bazooka Teaches4 years ago in Humans
Some of the Best Answers That Will Get You Smacked Upside Your Head
There comes a point in a person's life tat their tongue becomes their sword. Some people will walk up to you and try to upset your already fragile day. I should know. I have been through it for what seems like a million times.
By Maurice Bernier4 years ago in Humans
5 Ways to Train a Wolf
When training a wolf it is important that you reach the status of the alpha. You may not be comfortable with that. But you must get over your fear of being assertive immediately. This is not easy. Do you want to be loved or do you want to be eaten? I know. Tricky question. Please refer to the SELF ESTEEM post that I haven’t written yet.
By Camilla Rantsen5 years ago in Humans
Ten Reasons Why You Need a Straight Pride Parade
Dear Readers, It took me a while to write this. Not sure why; sometimes I blame work. But I thought I would do it before Pride Month ends. As someone who grew up in a divided household, this is targeted to those special individuals that have not felt safe due to being around what they call a social epidemic, The Gay Agenda. I know, not only do they have a whole month to brainwash our children, they also get to be gay for the rest of their lives. Who would have thought being gay was not just a phase? It is becoming the new norm and you, the Straights, feel you need the same rights. Please, refer to this article whenever you feel like explaining your Straight Pride.
By Argenis Ovalles5 years ago in Humans
Geometric Shapes
So, for some reason, I have always found myself in the middle. Quite honestly, once you’re in the middle it feels like there’s no going back. You really can’t find a way to escape from what essentially, you put yourself into. Life sucks that way sometimes. For instance, when you were younger and your friends used to be in a bit of a tiff, and it always ended up with you having to choose a side. Like dude, why would you do that to me? Rude. In my case, I tend to stay neutral. Basically, what I’m trying to say is I completely abort the situation. I run the other direction. No shame. This tactic I have acquired has helped me more times than I wish to admit, but hey at least I got out. When I say “got out,” I mean I let the scenario dissipate in a way. It’s a blessing. So this may all sound a bit confusing. What is she talking about, you might ask. I simply mean the good ole “love triangle.” In my case it has ended up being a love rhombus, hexagon, maybe even an octagon. All of the geometric shapes. And now, the good stuff begins.
By Miyah Henderson5 years ago in Humans
Millennials Next Target
Millennials. Is there nothing these pesky "young adults" won't try to ruin? First, they get married and stay married. Who told them that this was OK? Divorce was invented so that we didn't have to stay with one partner anymore. This is what our forefathers wanted for us. The ability to divorce and to have Donald Trump as President. He says the things that we wish we could like "covfefe." Brilliant. But Millennials don't like him either because they don't like nice things. Now, they have a new target in their sights and plan on destroying an industry that only makes billions of dollars a year: The wedding industry!
By Edward Anderson5 years ago in Humans
But It Could Be
It was my fourth birthday party. Everybody was there. It was a few months before my parent's separation, so they were still living in the same house. All of my cousins, both of my grandmothers and one of my grandfathers, uncles, and aunts. Everyone. That was the last time I had a birthday party with everyone together. I had a huge Barbie birthday cake and it was the best thing I had ever seen. Everyone had sung "Happy Birthday" and I had just blown out the candles when my brother stood up on the chair next to me and slammed his face into the cake before I could eat any of it. My dad went out and got a regular one from the store, but it just wasn't the same as my big Barbie one.
By Madison Belknap5 years ago in Humans
I Have a Really Nice Ass
I always took an extra 15 minutes to make sure my eyeliner was as even as possible and my eyelashes weren't clumpy in the slightest. I wore my retainer every night so my teeth stayed straight, and I always used whitening strips on the weeks I drank coffee. I glued on fake nails so often that I went through three tubes of glue since school started.
By Stormy Robertson5 years ago in Humans