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Here is a riddle for you: What's black and white and read all over?
If you're thinking of "a newspaper" then, I'm sorry, but you're wrong. Or at least you are now, as I was not too long ago. That was before a woman strolled into my workplace, before I was gifted with an unexpected surprise, and before I realized my whole life has been a lie.
I was working in my hometown's privately owned bank- how appropriate given the following circumstances- and was about to leave for home when a woman entered the building. She was smartly dressed in a three-piece power suit of a classic white shirt, black jacket and matching black pants with low-heeled black dress shoes. Her brunette hair, about two shades lighter than mine, was quaffed in a no-nonsense high and tight bun and her face was covered with a simple black face mask as per the new norm.
I turned in her direction, as did the other tellers (two in all), and we saw that she was addressing the assistant manager at her front desk. Thinking she was there to open an account or conduct some business for one of the many attorneys in our little hamlet we promptly turned back to our previous doings. My coworkers, and friends, resuming their work and I about to embark for home.
Yet as I was about to make my exit the phone rang and one of the tellers, Inga, picked it up quickly.
"Yes?" she asked. A moment later she called for me, "Chrys, Kayla wants to see you."
I sighed warily, both from the fatigue of the day and from anxiety of wondering if I did anything wrong, and changed course. I went to the front desk and saw the woman seated in a chair in front of the dark mahogany desk where my authoritative friend resided.
She smiled at me and motioned for me to sit in the chair next to our visitor.
Curious, but no less anxious, I took the offered seat as Kayla explained the situation.
"Chrys," she began, "I know you have a lot going on right now, and that you need to get some rest before your next job, but there is somebody here who would like to speak to you." She nodded at the woman next to me, "This is Ms. Susanna Erics, your dad's lawyer."
I looked at the women in surprise, "My dad's lawyer?" I made eye contact with Ms. Erics, "There must be a mistake. My dad passed away nearly two years ago."
Erics looked at me questionably, "I'm not sure who told you that, Ms. Seams, but I'm afraid that's a lie. Your father is very much alive and he wishes to finally meet you."
She reached into her suitcase, leafed through the files that were in there, and pulled at a piece of thick, legal paper before closing it back again. The woman handed it to me and I took it in my hands.
On it were the words "Confirmation of DNA Test Results" along with the insignia of an independent ancestry test center. It read as follows:
"This test confirms the paternity of Ms. Chrystal Seams to that of Mr. Andrew Howards"
Below that was an itemized chart of my ancestry linking my name to that of my mother and my newly discovered father along with the rest of my predecessors. While I knew nothing of my father's side of my family tree I have done previous searches of my mother's side and the names, dates, and relations thereof confirmed this revelation.
I sat back in my chair, my expression no doubt dazed as I absorbed all of this.
My entire life I had been wondering about my father, what kind of man he was, how he and my mother met, how he could leave me for so long. And then a few years previous my mother introduced me to a man who, in a vague sense, looked like he could be my father but did not necessarily feel like he could be him. We had talked for a while but he was more interested in his old hometown than he was in me, and then left shortly after, never to see me again. It was only until last year that I heard anything about him and that was only his death and my mother smirking indifferently about it.
"Good riddance," she had said, and that was the end of that.
Yet here I am holding documented proof that everything she had ever told me about my father- and my life- was a lie!
Erics placed a comforting hand on mine, "I know this must be a lot for you to take in, Ms. Seams, but I do have a few more things to tell you."
Fatigue and Anxiety were replaced with Curiosity and Caution as I looked back at her, "Such as?"
"Well-" She looked back at Kayla and asked, "Is there somewhere private we can talk?"
The woman nodded, "Let me open Mrs. Boden's office. Y'all can talk in there."
She went to another office where one of the loan officers was working at his desk, got the master keys from him, and went to open the promised office.
Erics and I went inside and Kayla shut the door to allow us the privacy requested before resuming her own work.
We sat in another set of chairs and Erics began again.
"Well, Ms. Seams, your father, Mr. Howards, has been in contact with your mother ever since the day you were born," she started. "He has made several attempts to see you and talk with you in person, but each time he has called she has either denied him permission to see you or has changed phone numbers. Despite this he has been giving her a large amount of money to pay for your education and other needs, only asking for some time to spend with you.
"When you came of age he wanted even more to see you and get to know you, but each time he was met with opposition from your mother. If it wasn't the usual line 'She doesn't want to see you,' then it was something else of the like. Most recently she told him this outlandish story that you were going through an emotional breakdown and that you had to be quarantined and put on strong medication."
My hands clenched in frustration.
My mother, my own mother, the woman I have trusted since birth, the only parental figure I have ever known, had not only lied to me she also lied about me!
Erics' voice penetrated my darkened thoughts as she continued the narrative.
"However by this time Mr. Howards was beginning to have his doubts and so decided to have her investigated. When he found out that everything she told him was false, and that she had been passing off a distant relative of his as your biological father to pacify you, he decided that he was going to cut off all financial ties to her and find another way to see you since you were of age."
I nodded then asked, "When exactly did he start the investigation, and when did he decide to stop financially supporting her?"
She opened her briefcase again, searched through the documents, and pulled out a little black notebook the likes of which I have not seen outside of the expensive section of my favorite bookstore. It was the size of a small notepad but the leaves of paper inside were as rich looking as that of the sheet the paternity test was printed on, and the book itself was bound inside of a smooth, faux leather texture that I sorely wanted to stroke my unworthy hand over.
The woman must have seen the look in my eyes and smiled. She went into the case once more and drew out another though slightly larger notebook of the same ebony shade and presented it to me.
"Consider it a very belated Christmas present from your father," she said kindly.
My eyes widened in surprise. My humbled conditioning told me to refuse but the woman, seeming to possess the gift of Insight, gently prodded the book towards me until I took it in my grateful hands.
Still smiling she leafed through the little black notebook and stopped nearly halfway before running a finger down the pages.
"Mr. Howards kept several of these notebooks as a record for all the transactions concerning you," she explained almost unconsciously.
A few seconds passed before she tapped at a spot in the small journal and nodded.
"According to this," she said, "the investigation started in 2008, around the time your maternal grandmother passed away." She added before continuing, "And he stopped giving her the money two years ago." She looked up at me again and said, "That was almost to the minute you-"
"Took out a loan for her so she could pay her debts," I finished bitterly as the memory came to mind.
(Two years prior...)
I came home from a late shift and saw my mother on the couch bent over a piece of paper in her shaking hands. I went up to her to see what the matter was when she folded it in half.
"What's wrong Mom?" I asked.
She looked at me and her eyes were filled with tears, "I'm sorry, Sweetie. I didn't want you to see me like this, but..." She took a shaking breath, "I've been behind on the house payments as of late and if I don't come up with the money soon they'll foreclose and we'll be living on the street."
Concerned I then asked, "How much do you owe?"
"Five thousand dollars," she immediately replied.
Naturally my eyes widened in shock! How could she have gotten so far behind on the payments like that?
As if reading my mind she said, "I've been paying off some other debts and I thought I had enough to cover the principal amount. But now..." She looked at me hopefully, "Honey? Can you loan me the money? I promise as soon as I catch up with the other bills I'll pay you back!"
I hesitated for a moment.
In the past I had lent my mother money for other things she had been short on with the promise of compensation, but they were such small amounts I simply waved them off. Yet here she was asking me for far more than I had to offer while I was trying to recoup what I had already given her and save up for my own place to help ease her burden.
She asked me more pleadingly, "PLEASE CHRYSSIE! I don't know who else to turn to! My credit's lousy so I can't apply for a loan, and I won't be able to save up that much before the deadline!"
A feeling of foreboding crept into the pit of my stomach. I knew it was not the smart thing to do, given my mother's record as previously stated, but...
I sighed, "I'll go to the bank before my next shift and see if I can get you the money."
She got up from the couch and embraced me, "Thank you! You're my savior! I promise I'll pay you back for everything!"
And in a way she did because the year had barely ended before she demanded more money from me. But when I said I could not give her any more because I was trying to pay off the loan she told me to leave.
So I did.
(Present time...)
The woman said, "You will, of course, be compensated for that."
I shook my head, "I appreciate that but that's not my concern right now. What I want to know is..." I took a breath and asked the question I have long since held in my heart, "Why?"
Susanna Erics smiled gently at me once more and tapped the notebook in my hands, "It's all in here."
I carefully opened the cover of the book and barely caught the envelope that was about to fall out of its hiding place. I placed it in the middle of the pages like a bookmark, as per my habit, and read the first page.
"My Dearest Chrystal,
Words cannot express how long I have waited for this moment, or the regret I feel in not trying to take you away sooner.
As you may have surmised your mother has not been truthful to you, or to me, and that has kept us apart far more than physical distance ever could. But you have always been on my mind.
When I first laid my eyes on you in the maternity ward of the hospital I wanted so much to take you in my arms and feel your little heart beating beside mine. Yet your mother and grandmother would not let me anywhere near you, at least not until I proved myself worthy enough to be part of their family.
This in itself was very hypocritical considering the fact they were no better off than I was and I was working nights as a waiter at the time.
Regardless I told them that I was willing to marry your mother, take responsibility for bringing you into this world, and raise and love you with all of my heart.
Your grandmother scoffed at me though, saying that a fool like me would never amount to anything, and your mother only made things worse by saying that I wasn't your father. She claimed that your father was a rich man who would give her whatever she wanted and she did not need me in her life.
I argued with her because I knew deep down in my heart you were my daughter and said that, if need be, I would go to court and have them give me custody of you. In response they had caused such a ruckus that the orderly on call believed their words over mine and shuttled me out of the hospital.
I returned the next day determined to see you again and to fight for your custody with my own family for support. However your mother had taken you away by then and since she didn't list me as your father and DNA tests were not common back then, I couldn't prove you were my daughter and was denied access to her whereabouts.
I would not give up though and called your grandmother's home on the off chance that she had taken you there so I could speak to them.
Fortune smiled on me and your mother picked up the phone. As I told her in the hospital I was still willing to marry her and have a family with the both of you, and like her mother she scoffed at me.
"The only way you'll ever see her is if you pay me child support," she said before she hung up.
And that's what I did. I paid her everything I had in my pocket and worked long hours everyday since then with the hopes of seeing you. Even when the time came for me to move away to find work elsewhere I kept paying her every month for the past 20 years.
Fast forward to now. As Ms. Erics, my solicitor, may have told you I've started investigating your mother and had stopped giving her the monthly payments when I found out what had really happened to you and what has recently become of you. And, quite honestly, I couldn't be even more proud of you and the woman you've become.
After everything that's happened to you, after all of the misery you've had to endure, you've still turned out to be the kindest, loving and most spirited person that's ever lived, and you deserve so much more than what you were given.
Which is why I want to ask you to come live with me. I have enough money now to where I can support both of us for many years and enough clout to get you a job anywhere you choose. You could even go back to school and get a degree in whatever field you want, or start your own business. Whatever you want to do is all yours now.
All I ask is to spend what remaining time we might have left on this crazy planet we live on together.
RSVP,
Drew Howards"
Tears fall from my eyes and dot the pages that are covered in his handwriting.
This man, who until very recently has been a total stranger to me, wants to get to know me and is even willing to cover the cost for whatever I want.
While a part of me was scared of leaving a greater part of me was jumping for joy at this new adventure and where it could take me.
After all, what would I need to stay in this small town for? A mother who lied to me my whole life and kicked me out when her money well ran dry? Too many memories of opportunities missed because of her manipulation and greed?
No! This was my chance to make something more of myself and, for good or for bad, I was going to take it!
I wiped my eyes with my sleeve and lock them with the woman in front of me, "When do we leave?"
She thought about it before answering, "We can leave as early as the weekend. That should give you time to get your affairs in order." She took the envelope I stuck in the book earlier and handed it to me, "And this should help you get them finished faster."
I opened the envelope, took out what was inside, and dropped the book in the process.
There in my hands, black and white and read ten times over, was a check made out for $20,000.00!
Susanna smiles at me, "Would that cover everything?"
I can only nod.
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