Fall, A Time To Embrace Change

Fall is a time when, it’s used for reflecting, embracing change, and revisiting the past year. It’s when the air gets crisper, the weather gets unpredictable, and the leaves change their colors to dramatic reds, yellows, golds, and greens. I am going to explore deeper into the usage of the word fall during the autumn season.

Why do we use the word fall in autumn?

It’s autumn; why don’t we just say it’s autumn? Is the word fall used because the temperatures are falling to a chilly, damp temperature? Is it because time falls back? It’s a time when we reflect on the past year, like the reflecting sunlight on the leaves that highlights all the veins, the colors, and all the blemishes on the leaves.

When fall or autumn, whatever you want to call it, comes around, it is a time when people realize we’re closer to the holidays, which means we’re closer to the end of the year. It’ll be time to think about those dreaded resolutions for New Year’s — you know, the ones that we thought of last year but didn’t complete.

The Running Clock

Fall feels like a clock running down in a football game. Our clock is ticking, and the announcers are shouting, Will the play be made? Did we do what we wanted to do this year?

So for me, I always find that fall is the time to become more introspective about my life, my goals, and what happened the past few months. I do find that I walk in autumn, watch the falling leaves, and ponder each leaf as a moment in my life’s events. I find myself searching for the leaf that inspires me.

My Leaf

When I find that leaf that’s calling to me, I usually pick it up from all the other fallen leaves. tracing the veins with my eyes as if they were the paths that I have traveled this past year. I play at those scenes simultaneously, and I let them come and go.

I explore the colors of my leaf with all their blemishes and wrinkles. Watching the shadows dance around playing with each other as I shift my leaf, twisting it between my fingers so I can catch the Golden Light of this past year, I see the shadows of darkness play along as there have been dark moments this past year with my bright, beautiful moments.

When I’m ready to let go of my leaf, my fingers open, and I watch my leaf fall back to the ground. It’s my moment of detachment. I watch my leaf among all the other leaves, and I think back to the word fall.

Time To Detach

I feel a sense of detachment from my leaf, but that is what needs to happen. It’s time to detach from the events that no longer serve me. My eyes travel down my legs to view all the other leaves, and I remind myself to stay here. Stay in this moment.

As I stand among the leaves, quiet like a tree that’s shredding its leaves, I see my colorful leaf around the other leaves. I think of my “falling” moments from the past year. It’s like a movie trailer softly playing in my mind’s eye.

The Movie Trailer

The moment when my dad passed away was a beautiful moment, as I held his hand so he wasn’t afraid. The dark moment when reality hit was that he was gone. Both my parents were gone. When it came to telling everyone he was gone, there was that mix of colorful lights and darks playing out on the phone. The sadness was relieved by the relief that he was no longer in pain.

The beautiful moments of family coming together for a tender goodbye as we laid him to rest right next to our mother The beautiful moments of having people call from far and wide and express how my father has touched their lives; the light moments of laughter around the card table playing family games with my husband and children

The falling moments of learning my boundaries with my adult children and accepting that I was not at my best The falling moments of grief and how it can be a dam that breaks in a way that you didn’t see coming

It’s Nature

So yes, there have been beautiful moments. There have not been beautiful moments. Do I have blemishes on my leaf that intersect with my colorful leaf? Absolutely. It’s nature. My leaf is symbolically what human nature is with all its beauty — the veins, the wrinkles — there are those blemishes and dark marks.

Just like nature, it’s time to say goodbye to my fallen leaf. I pick up my feet and walk away from my leaf because it’s time to move forward and not hold on. I feel other leaves crunching under my sneakers. Just as nature is shredding its leaves to make room for new growth, I embrace the opportunity for that change.

Welcoming Growth

I allow the essence of the fall season to envelope me like a warm blanket. I am ready to grow and evolve with nature.

So yes, I understand why fall is used in autumn.

It’s symbolically time for me to accept what is. To start a new season, to appreciate what I have, to relive some of my falling moments and my beautiful moments of the past year, and to embrace the next season because, just like nature, it’s time for change.

I would love to hear what the word Fall means to you. If you enjoyed this, please give a few claps or more. I am an artist and photographer first and foremost, writing takes me some time as it doesn’t come as easily. So I would appreciate the encouragement that I am on the right path.

This was original posted on Medium.