Racecars in Hollywood

I have been a car guy for longer than I can remember. Apparently, before I could talk, I could make puttering noises as I "drove" toy cars around me. When I got older, I eschewed the traditional "invisible friend" for an invisible dump truck. I honestly only know that because of the stories I heard from parents and grandparents... it was a LONG time ago.

And as a kid, I LOVED cars in movies and on TV. And they made it incredibly difficult for me.

The Fast and Furious movies are a good example. What's not to love? Fast cars, cool paint... pretty girls... but that owuld be a different post.

Let's get shifty...

Let's look at one of the glaring issues with F&F. Transmissions.

Watch one of those movies... shifting is like smoking in a 1940 film noire. Need visual movement as the camera focuses on a driver? Shift. Need to increase the tension? Shift again. "Oh crap, our hero was just passed." Shift a couple more times.

I counted upshifts in one scene... there were like twenty for one car. He never downshifted... EVER.

Aside from the pure number, shifting does NOT give the result they delivered. Have these directors EVER driven a car? Forget driving a manual transmission... I don't know that they remember driving a car.

And nitrous oxide... NOS. Let me spoil something, it does NOT turn the car into the NCC Enterprise launching into warp. It doesn't allow physics to be suspended, even for a moment.

If you are unfamiliar with NO2, it has been around for a while. Some allied aircraft actually used it during WWII for an extra burst of power. Basically, it is sprayed into the engine, allowing more fuel to be injected, and increasing power. More oxygen, more fuel, more boom.

And the power can be substantial. Hundreds of horsepower... on the right engine.

But here is where it gets messy. Engines only turn so fast before their internal parts become external parts... No bueno. Ventilated engine blocks are not more efficient. And they are messy.

So, when you hit the button (that is what actuated the nitrous going into the intake, as well as added fuel) the engine accelerates faster. And redline... when the engine needs to be shifted before turning into performance art... happens sooner.

Generally, when drag racing, a driver will only hit the button in top gear. That is when the power is needed most.

Back to shifting... You CAN'T shift while under nitrous boost. That will turn the tens of thousands of dollars of engine into scrap. Explosive scrap.

But guess what? They do it all the time in the movies. Aside from turning 25,000 rpm (revolutions per minute... most engines become quite grumpy before 6,000 rpm)

And another thing...

Anger management.

Watch a movie with racing. At some time, our hero will become angry. He just got beat, and he needs to get back into the lead. What is he going to do?

First, he shifts. Gee... who would have guessed that?

Then, he gets mad. As he goes into Hulk mode, he drives like a man possessed, and blows out of the turn to retake the lead, win the race and kiss the trophy girl before they drive off into the sunset.

Let's look at this...

First, in races, the best passes happen under braking. Yes, you CAN get the jump and come out of the turn and beat the other driver to the end of the straight. BUT, the entrance to the turns is where races are generally won or lost. Braking just a moment later, getting just a little better line, and lurking into the draft of the leading car are the REAL ways to get an advantage... all without using up the tires too fast.

Honestly, REAL racing is kind of boring in that regard. It is a hundred little things. It's more like chess than WWE.

Second... if our hero can get mad and go faster, why wasn't he going faster before he got mad? Mad drivers are NOT better drivers. In fact, they kind of suck. They use up the tires too fast, if they don't blow the car up or ball it into the wall first.

But the reality is that EVERY driver is doing everything he can EVERY lap to be as fast as he can without using up the car. that means that the "hero" that shifts the car into hyper-drive and blows by the bad guy, is really a LOT more likely to pile into the wall three seconds later. Roll end credits.

And one other thing...

No crew chief EVER says, "Slow and steady wins the race."

It doesn't. Everyone knows this. The ONLY people that think slow and steady wins the race are people that don't race. And people that are slow and steady... and never win races.

FAST and steady is in the race. FASTER and steadier wins. Just watch racers. they all have "marks" they want to hit on the track. Kind of like your trip to work, they are taking the same route on every lap. Obviously... but seriously. While your "consistency" might be the left on Maple Street, their might be braking halfway between the 100 and 200 yard markers before turn three. There might be a funky spot on the inside curb, and they aim to brush the curb five feet after that... EVERY lap. They have to adjust for traffic, but they know what they want to do.

Lap times are measured the the hundredth of a second, and the difference between first and second, after dozens, or even hundreds of laps is also sometimes just hundredths of a second.

A little here and a little there, along with saving the tires for when the other driver is just a little bit off coming into the turn, so you can get on the throttle just a split second before him and control YOUR line into the next turn... THAT is how racers run.

There might be anger. There might be absolute rage. But there is no place for it in the car. Later.

The driver's job is to keep the engine and tires from overheating. The crew chief's job is often to keep the driver from overheating.

In the end...

the problem with racing is that it is actually a VERY subtle sport. Fencing, but with cars instead of epees. Small mistakes, small gains.

And even racers don't have twenty-speed transmissions. And they don't get to ignore the rules of physics... not even a little.

I still like the movies, though.

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