Welcome to the Planet

Hello and welcome to earth

We’re all just existing on this bountiful girth

Our world’s full of confusion, people, and stuff

Be sure to take it all in ’til you’ve had quite enough.

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Hello and welcome to our fine planet

Let us know once you’ve run the full gamut

Complete with seeing our muddied oceans and streets

Be sure to make time for all the popular beats.

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Hello and welcome, it’s a pleasure to meet you

Now you’re here, all alien like, and right on cue

We wondered how long it would be until you arrived

Hope you can do your best in this place and survive.

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Hello and welcome, we hope you will like us

We’re sure for you aliens, it's Hollywood or bust

So take tours of our big cities and favorite great sites

Just remember you’re not a citizen, you have no real rights.

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Hello and welcome, our extraterrestrial friends

We’re scared but just happy this isn’t the end

Are you having a good time, seeing all our good views?

We’re relieved that our demise won't be on the night's news.

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Hello and welcome to this fantasy land

Where your dreams can come true, ever so grand

We can make your deep wishes all come true

Though what you actually want, we haven’t a clue.

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Hello and welcome, take what you need

If we have to, we’ll be happy to plead

Just leave us our money, big homes, and cars

Look all you want, don't do anything bizarre.

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Hello and goodbye, we’ve had a really bad time

Though we’d tell you to your face it’s been quite sublime

We really hope you won’t come back real soon

Please just hurry and head straight to the moon.

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Goodbye and good riddance, we don't want you here

We’ve had enough green men to last us ten years

We’ll take our world as we know it without any change

Because we found you ever so odd and quite strange.

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Hello dear humans, thank heavens it’s just us

This planet evolves much better without any fuss

Now the little green men in their spaceships went poof

We’d much rather study those fellows, far and removed, all aloof.

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Goodbye and good night, we’ll rest easy this evening

Knowing our little green visitors left is so relieving

Now we can live our lives like real ordinary humans

Instead of spending our days with those alien sub-humans.