Everything but what I need to do,
O how desperately I am trying to
Escape.
Trying to avoid the cold hands of fate,
But deep down I know
That running and jumping
Is not the way to go.
I need to slow down,
But instead I speed up.
What’s wrong with me?
I’ve gotta practice self-compassion
Even though I know what I do
Is not so rational.
A simple lapse in judgement,
I know I can try again tomorrow.
I know I can shed this sorrow;
But I just need time.
One day I will look back with gratitude,
And one day I will look back and smile.
It feels so real right now,
But I know this is just one moment in time.
I am so grateful for the place I visit
And for the faces I meet
When I escape.
They teach me a lot about this world,
And the lowest of lows remind us
Just how high we can go.
Trying to run but my feet are melting.
I look around but no one is helping.
Seems like everyone around me are zombies,
Unawakened and unbothered mentally.
Escaping my mind;
And I always forget to slow down.
Maybe one day I’ll learn
But I am not rushing at all.
One day I will stand tall
And this moment will be
A distant memory.
Very grateful for the experiences and lessons
That are granted to me.
Extremely thankful for the ability
To fulfill my own destiny.
In love with the wisdom that dwells in my brain,
Even if I only touch it when I escape.
My brain is always yelling at me
And I try not to let it get to me,
But sometimes it does.
Often it does.
I take a deep breath when this happens
And I escape into my happy place.
I used to be interrupted all the time
But now I’m like a master at it.
I’m a master at blending the lines,
And a master of time
Within my own mind.
One day I swear I’ll balance out.
One day I know I ride it out,
And the stress won’t push me to hide.
But for now,
I don’t mind it.
For now,
I will continue retreating into my mind.
Sometimes I have to remind myself,
That this is just a coping mechanism.
And I have to wonder if I could find another.
I know that I can
But maybe I don’t want to.
Maybe I don’t need to.
Maybe I could just avoid all my problems
Until they decide to go away.
Maybe I can retreat
And save my issues for another day.
Escapism.
I guess it really is the root of all my troubles.
And I guess I don’t need to double them.
So I’m honing back in on my real life.
Making sure to tend to my
Daily obligations.
I’m washing the dishes
And cleaning the carpets.
Taking the time
To balance it out.
Having my fun
And I won’t pout when it ends.
Like a bull,
I will run full speed ahead
And toward my responsibility.
No longer will I squirm to escape
My everyday life.
I know just how silly and trite it can be
To stay all day in my imaginary land.
So from this day forth,
I plan to be a real man.
I’m gonna put my foot in the sand.
Time and time again,
I was told not to daydream.
But in the end,
It was my best scheme.
I mapped out a world
Of my own design.
And now here I am,
Telling this rhyme.
It’s okay to drift off,
But wouldn’t it be better
To live in that world you’re thinking?
Wouldn’t it be better
To make that dream a reality?
About the Creator
Ari Asha Love
Been writing all my life but the question is whether or not I truly take it seriously.
You can find me on most social media platforms as afroqueergod :)
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