Enjoy Your Sunsets

This sunset was snapped from inside my bedroom sliding doors in December 2015 in Northeast Oklahoma.

It was taken on my iPad Mini, all I did was aim, tap the center of the screen for automatic focus, and clicked.

I posted this picture on my Facebook wall, and got comments like:

"Beautiful"

"Really pretty, did you take it?"

"Is your backyard on fire?"

"How did you do that?"

Doesn't seem like a big deal does it? Anyone can snap a picture on their tablet or smartphone right?

Except I'm Deafblind, or to be more specific, Deaf and legally blind. I hardly have any peripheral vision left and my glasses can only correct my vision to roughly 20/100.

I rely on accessibility features on my tech gadgets like a magnifier, dark mode and extra large text. I get around out in public with my white cane and prefer communicating in American Sign Language (ASL).

In the five years since I've taken that photo, my vision has deteriorated some more.

I haven't visit an eye doctor in a few years, I've always dreaded going while growing up, sitting in a dark room expected to lipread and understand everything the doctor says while my eyes are all blurry on drops? Yeah, no thanks.

Besides none of them could give me a proper name for my eye disease, I've gotten inconsistent answers over the years I don't even know what the prognosis will be - stay the same, worsen slowly, or go completely blind.

Enjoy the "Now"

Even if I do receive a bad prognosis, I'm still going to enjoy the "now".

What would be the point of screaming or wailing "life is so unfair", or hiding under the sheets being depressed about something that hasn't happened yet?

I have a life that I enjoy, and need to enjoy - now.

Time with my kids, hanging with the hubby, family reunions, meeting friends from social media in person, traveling, and enjoying more sunsets.

I'll "grieve" later.

Be Prepared

At the same time I'm also preparing for the potential future.

I'm currently learning Braille from a free correspondence course offered by the Hadley Institute.

Braille: I love Vocal Media

My thinking is to get proficient now while I can still somewhat see and avoid the frustration of learning when I can't. (Since I'm deaf, I receive the instructions in a large print manual instead of on an audiotape).

I am also researching future employment opportunities I can take on when I can no longer depend on my vision. Right now I work as a freelance writer and online American Sign Language tutor.

I believe we all need to be proactive and prepare ourselves for better independence and living a full life.

Giving up and becoming totally dependent on someone else for everything is totally impractical and detrimental to one's health.

Life Goes On

A rare photo of a sunrise as I'm definitely not a morning person.

I also snapped this picture of an early sunrise out of our van window with the same iPad mini. No filters, no special steps, just point and click.

This is how I try to approach life - no filters, no special steps, just point and click. Keeping things real, having practical expectations, and staying positive.

Now of course I'm not all lovey-dovey all the time, expecially when I haven't had coffee, enough sleep, or am hungry, heh - you get the picture.

This quote comes to mind:

You see, no matter what happens to you in your life, it does not define you.

So what if I become fully Deafblind? Sure, I'll grieve for a while and there'll be an adjustment period for everyone, but it doesn't get to define who I am.

I'll still be the snarky, coffee-drinking, white cane swinging woman I've always been.

You just don't know what life will hand you, so enjoy the sunsets.