Soaked Pages

It was third period in the tenth grade and my Spanish teacher had just cut the lights off and turned on a movie for us to watch. While the other girls in the class were attempting to cuddle up next to their boyfriends and play footsies under the extra tiny desks hoping to go unnoticed, I reached into my backpack and pulled out a book I had been hiding from my Mom. We grew up in strict home and the one thing my Mom was sure of was that she was going to teach us to stay away from sex and anything sexual so we did not get pregnant at a young age like she did. I am not sure she understood that making sex so taboo only made us more curious at that age, but it did. I propped the book open under my backpack and started reading it while the movie played in a language I didn't care to learn. Every time I turned a page, I could feel butterflies in my stomach and my palms would start to sweat because I was anticipating the next event. The descriptions and the details down to the way the moonlight hit certain parts of the bodies of the couples while making love or the placement of freckles on the main characters face were tiny examples of how captivating this story was. At this point in my life I was no longer a virgin so it wasn't a matter of being fully curious but it was more so a desire to feel the level of ecstasy as it was described in this book that I just couldn't seem to put down.

I finished the book in 2 days and that was only because when I was at home I couldn't read it and would have to hide it so my Mom couldn’t find it. My younger sister would hide her "forbidden page turners" under our bathroom sink beneath the barrett bucket so I couldn't put mine there but she wasn't good at sneaking at all. I would notice her long stints in the bathroom and would hold my ear up to the door.. no running water and no flushing of the toilet- she was in there reading. I found a spot between the teddy bears I had set up in a corner of my room and hid my book there.

I still remember turning that last page, 322... and seeing a note from the Author on a page labeled "Notes from EJD" and a few smiley faces. I felt empty and was brought back to reality almost instantly. I wanted to know what happened next.. did the couple stay together.. ever have kids.. did she leave her job or maybe even continue to sleep with the other man out of revenge.. tell me! I found out from a friend during the bus ride home that there was another book out but she couldn't get her hands on it until the following week and when she did, she was going to read it first. It was almost like I was a fiend and needed my next fix.

I have tried to explain the feelings I had after finding out Eric Jerome Dickey passed away but for some reason as the most vocal woman usually in any room, I can't. Erics books taught me how to organize my thoughts, hone in on my imagination and put my words in order so well it became extremely easy for me to not only captivate my reader but switch up my writing style as needed. My honors English teacher my eleventh grade year told me, "there is something about your writing that is well beyond your years.. I don't know who you have been reading but don’t stop." I will forever hold his art dear to my heart and when I go through my at home library to read over my favorites I will read his a little slower as to saver the moments. I have never felt this kind of pain and sense of pressure when someone I have never met in the physical has died but it is like I lost a dear friend. When you write so well your audience can build a relationship with you through a pen- you can write.

Our community may not understand now and may never understand the Legend we lost. I know as time progresses so does technology and maybe his books will one day be mere faded memories to some and even referenced as the "old way" we used to escape the hell we are living in today but they will forever remain dear to me. Eric paved the way for writers like me and he dominated an industry that didn't have many that looked like us at a time before we were even widely accepted to not only write but to have our work spread across platforms like it is now.

You will be missed Eric. Sleep in peace.