Love and Marriage Commonly Differ in Three Ways
Three Key Differences Between Love and Marriage: Why Early Understanding Matters
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In the traditional Chinese concept, love and marriage cannot be compared. Love is sacred and rarely mixed with money, material, and other things. Marriage is different. It is described as "suitable," which we often call a good match. It is always a blessing to marry for love.
Compared with the era when parents could only get to know each other through blind dates, free love gives us the right to choose. Naturally, everyone wants to make their marriage pure and noble. Then, you must weigh the relationship between marriage and love after marriage. The sooner you understand the difference between marriage and love, the better you can grasp your happiness.
1. Love is an emotional impulse, while marriage is more of a responsibility
Marriage did not exist in prehistoric societies. Thanks to human evolution, we live in the age of private property. A marriage system will be in place to safeguard property. What is marriage—an assertion between the genders?
Cherish and marriage vary because cherish is checked by unsteady temperament swings, hormonal drives, and passionate motions. We had to snicker, cry, and battle, possibly able to all concur that falling in cherish had to have been a capable encounter.
Perhaps we all understand that falling in love must have had an emotional impact: We must have cried, laughed, and quarrelled. No matter the cause, we can say whatever we want. If the relationship is not good, we can break up, and we will not be bound by anything.
When we get married, marriage is different. It represents a commitment and responsibility. It is a legal relationship that both parties must abide by. It means loyalty; unlike in love, we can break up at any time. However, it also entails accountability. Ladies and men are accomplices. Their targets and, more vitally, their dreams propel both sides to put forward a parcel of exertion together.
As a Japanese researcher said, children will drop in love, but marriage must be for grown-ups. In general, love is more about enjoyment, love, and love. It is naturally great to have love in marriage. If it is very light, the responsibility and wisdom of each other will also give the marriage a strong sense of stability and a light sense of happiness.
2. Love is more illusory, while marriage is real
I still remember what the boy who proposed to my roommate in college said at that time: I will never let you be wronged, never let you suffer, will love you forever, and will give you happiness!
Love is sometimes a beautiful result imagined by our minds. The most anticipated love must be in the ambiguity and budding period. At that time, we can make a vow, but when we get it, we will find that love may not be as beautiful as imagined.
We always overestimate the influence of love on us. How many people are easy to make promises to when love comes, and who can fulfil them?
My college roommate and the boy who proposed to me married after graduation. At first, they were still immersed in the ocean of love. As time passed, the various things at work and the trivialities at home made the two young people unbearable. They constantly quarrelled, and the relationship became solemn. They faced the torment of breaking up many times. They may have forgotten those beautiful vows.
Love is our lifelong yearning, and marriage is a process that most people will experience. Are you in pain when faced with the dilemma between illusory love and natural marriage?
This kind of pain will bring growth. Marriage is the most real channel through which to touch life. Whether it is firewood, rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar, and tea or the handling of the relationship between two families, marriage is an essential practice for each of us.
The practice of marriage is never a matter of one person but two people or even a family. It is its complexity. A good marriage requires wisdom and art to manage and both sensibility and rationality to jointly control. It is no longer just an emotional impulse.
If we still want to have the vision of love after marriage, we must manage it with our hearts. Both parties must manage it together, maintain the independent space of love so that the mundane world will not become a bargaining chip when the two people attack each other, and let the heart-warming love remain pure.
3. Love is always unequal, and a real marriage needs balance
My friend's sister got divorced, and the man first proposed. It surprised us all because it was well known that her husband pursued her then. He was picked up by a flower gift car every day, and he also went abroad for Western food and wine, which made us envious. The lady's killer weapon is beauty, as beautiful as a female star.
The two later tied the knot and welcomed the baby. I heard my friend's family status was deficient, just like when they were in love, and his wife was still arrogant and bossy. She's shocked, beyond any doubt, but what kind of man might endure her need for certainty for so long?
On a daze date, a marriage counsellor companion brought up the plausibility that adores only persevere at the end of time: no weariness and a substantial cost tag.
However, such feelings often do not last because the hormonal impulse lasts only a few months.
But marriage is different. Marriage is long-lasting, and it is wisdom under rationality. There used to be a fundamental principle of happiness in marriage: the contributions of each other are equal. If one person feels that the contribution is not equal or not worth it in marriage, the balance of marital happiness will collapse.
Marriage is not about being in love with each other but about supporting each other and going on. We need to think from each other's perspectives. If one person keeps giving and does not get a response from the other, this relationship will often disappear.
Therefore, we need to understand the difference between marriage and love to have a bottom line in our hearts. Before getting married, you must go slowly and experience more love. After all, love is the best way for us to learn the art of love and a meaningful way to learn intimacy between the sexes.
To put it bluntly, love, confession, kissing, and making each other happy are enough. Still, when entering into marriage, you need to be mature to deal with the complex situation, know what to do, and not turn over at any time, but to stabilize the marriage and move towards a greater distance.
About the Creator
Barry Kowaski
Barry enthusiastically writes honest love and relationship essays. His themes are love, commitment, and emotional connection. His kind words and relevant experiences offer practical advice and deep love insights.
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