Taboo Is the Greatest Arousal
I was a student working at a halfway house while he was an excon just out of the joint .
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It was my third year of my philosophy degree that I found myself likened to secure myself a job at the local halfway house as a way to earn a bit of money whilst broadening my perspective upon rehabilitation and the criminal element. A win-win situation, I believed. I couldn’t have known then that such a choice would lead me into the clutches of a man capable of upending all that I’d previously believed in life, effectively pulling the foundation of my perceptions right out from under me. My life would never be the same again…
My new position required me to spend much of my spare time at the house, as well as a fair few nights. It was on my first day, as I was moving in a few of my possessions when I first laid eyes upon him. He was looking quite disheveled in what had once been a white tank top streaked with grease, dirt and… blood? Judging by the look of his magnificently sculpted arms snaked with cuts and bruises drawn down into absolutely battered hands, this man was just returning from some sort of brawl. I could only assume the other fighter was far worse for wear as I brought my gaze up to a face free of any such lacerations and wearing the most vile, self confident smirk I’d ever witnessed. My eyes still glued to his deep brown piercing ones, it dawned on me that I was staring, ogling him even. And he certainly had noticed, judging by the way that smirk deepened as he gave my body a once over.
Quickly breaking my gaze and shaking my head at myself, I returned to grabbing my last bag from the cab as my driver gave me a wave and peeled off into the depths of Vancouver’s streets once again.
“You sure you can take all that?” The deep raspy voice sent shivers of pleasure down my spine and evoked a certain wetness from between my thighs. Even his voice aroused me.
“I’m quite alright, thank you,” I respond in that brisk diplomatic voice I usually reserve for debates and addressing overly enthusiastic boys. I’ve simply no time to get caught up in such frivolous distractions, after all; I’m out to change the world, you see.
“Well, maybe someday you’ll show me just how much you can take,” came his patronizing response as his large hands descended to his old tattered jeans pocket to retrieve a cigarette pack and ever so slowly, his eyes never leaving mine, place a lone cigarette between his deep red lips. And oh the way he masterfully lit that cigarette nearly had me yearning to partake in such a disgusting habit.
Instead of asking him for one, I pulled myself together, gave this rogue stranger a glare, and hoisted my bag up and over my shoulder as I turned towards the aging two story which would now be my second home. Only when I was halfway up those creaking porch steps did I recognize an ambling stride lazily following me up the stairs. Taking a deep breath as an attempt to settle myself and putting on my best no-bullshit face, I turned to face that dazzlingly scraggly stranger.
“Are you following me, sir?”
“Huh, with a view like that, hard not to… Plus, you know, I live here,” was all the answer I received as his grinning face squeezed right past me and on into the house.
"Fuck me," I thought. This is going to be a hell of a lot harder than I had ever anticipated.
* * *
“Alright, so curfew is 9:30 PM always. No exceptions. Don’t let them try to talk their way around that one. And believe me, they’ll try. You’ve got to stand your ground here. Call their P.O. if they’re not here on time. They remain in the house here until 7 AM…” This all coming from the head facilitator of the house as he expertly rattles through the rules. He had introduced himself simply as John and from the strong jawline topped off by steady eyes and a perfect buzz cut, I could only assume he was ex-military. I wonder how he ended up in a job such as this.
“They’re all pretty good men, just made a mistake they’ll pay for the rest of their lives. Our job here is to provide structure and resources as they go about putting their lives back together. Show interest but don’t get too attached.” With this, he stopped rustling through the mountain of papers on his desk to give me a stern look.
“The only one I’d have to warn you about currently is Eli. Eli Milkovich. Comes from a dysfunctional family over in Newton. Mom died while he was a kid and the dad's an alcoholic and a career criminal. Eli seems to be heading down the same path as his dear old dad. Kid’s been out of the joint for about a week now but I wouldn’t give him another one 'til he’s back in,” he continued.
Almost knowing the answer already, I still manage to ask: “Which one is Eli?”
“Oh right, you haven’t been introduced yet. We’ll do that at dinner later. That’s where we usually go through how everyone’s day was, how they controlled their urges and what their intentions are for the next day. Eli’s about 5’11”, brown eyes, stocky build, never clean shaven no matter how many times we tell him it’ll help his chances of securing employment. 26-years-old and I don’t think the man’s held down an actual job a day in his life. You’ll quickly learn here that some are just too far-gone. Anyhow, follow me and I’ll show you to your room while you’re here.”
* * *
“So, Poppy, you ever experience the pleasure your name suggests?”
That slow confident drawl causes me to lose my grip on the bowl. I’d been washing up after dinner and soap shoots up and out of the sink, sprinkling my arms and shirtfront with bubbles. I feel myself start to blush as I turn and face Eli’s smirking face from his perch against the kitchen doorframe. God, even the way he leans his muscular body against that frame is the most gorgeously powerful stance I could now ever imagine. "What the fuck is this man doing to me?" I wonder. I’m usually so in control. Nothing and no one gets under my skin. Not ever. And yet here is the most dangerous man I’ve yet come in contact with and I struck dumb just when I need my wits about me.
“Excuse me?” I manage to levelly ask.
“Frankly, I’m not much of a heroin junky.” With that, he pulls his body erect and takes a step towards me. “Don’t really care much for the dry mouth.”
Oh, God. I can feel my stomach fluttering as I watch him take yet another step in my direction, his eyes never leaving mine.
“I personally prefer something a little less expensive, a little less addicting.”
I feel a bit like a deer struck in the headlights here. I can’t seem to break his gaze, let alone pull my hands from the sink of soapy water. I’m stuck, vulnerable to this criminal stalking every so slowly towards me, obviously enjoying the effect he’s having on me. One more step and a whiff of him envelops me. Tobacco, sweat, and a hint of something musky; fire maybe? Oh lord, is it ever arousing though. I can feel that familiar heat igniting between my thighs once again. It takes all my self-control to say:
“I’d suggest maybe not indulging in any such substance until you get off probation, Mr. Milkovich.”
With that, he came to a halt just beside my leaning body at the sink and chuckled. Placing his battered hand on the counter just beside him, he continues to stare me down. Does this man ever blink?
“So you’re one of them,” he states.
Feeling the blush spread down my neck to my ample bosom, I finally tear my eyes away and question:
“Them?”
“A law-abiding citizen; a good girl.”
I look back up to see he’s taken another step towards me, effectively closing the distance between us. His face is now inches from mine, his deep brown eyes peering down into my hazel ones. Eyes so dark you can’t tell where the pupil ends and the iris begins, it draws to mind Nietzsche’s famous quote: “If you gaze long enough into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”
I’m absolutely overwhelmed. All of my willpower I had once thought so strong is going into the task of keeping my hands in the sink beside me. I honestly don’t know where they might go if I let them free. For the first time in my life, I feel as if I don’t trust myself to find out.
His breath warms my face with the scent of tobacco and a faint hint of beer as he leans his face in even closer. I feel certain he can hear my heart hammering away in my chest now. His mouth descends to my ear, hot air gliding across my neck, caressing my skin as he cockily whispers:
“You may have everyone else fooled, but deep down I know that you’re no good girl.”
With that he pulls back, gives me a fleeting wink and lumbers back towards the hallway he’d come from. Gracious, I think as I fall back against the counter and attempt to get my heart and breath back in check. What is happening to me here? I’m losing control.
Turning my body back to the dishes my mind remains racing through the possibilities of what I should do next. I could quit, say that this just isn’t what I expected. Return my possessions and myself to campus. Or…
* * *
That "or" placated me for the time being. Having my wits back about me, I decided to not rush into any rash decisions that night. I chose to do this for a reason, after all. Mentally congratulating myself on a decision reached, I spit my toothpaste into the sink and ran my toothbrush under the tap.
The opening of the bathroom door broke my gaze from the water pooling around the drain and I glance into the mirror in surprise to find Eli’s black abyss of a gaze staring back at me.
“You can’t be in here!” I exclaim, emotion clouding my voice.
In silence, without breaking my gaze reflected in the mirror, he sidesteps fully into the bathroom and with a flick of his powerful wrist locks the door behind him. It feels like an eternity with no movement, no words spoken between us — just the most powerfully intimate eye contact I’ve ever experienced. Finally, he breaks the spell and smirks knowingly at me as he stalks towards me a few steps until he’s directly behind me. I’m so very aware of the heat emanating off his body as his hands come to rest on either side of mine on the lip of the sink. Not quite touching but goddamn do I ever want to. Just to move my hand a half-inch to the side; just to lean back into him and feel that firm chest at my back. I almost cum just thinking about it, having him here with me.
In those few seconds, I was rendered incapacitated by sheer wanton pleasure. He’d moved closer to me. His body pressed so close to mine. If only I should lean back, I’d be right against him. I can feel his magnificent cock nestled between my pert ass cheeks. I can’t take it anymore! My eyes pop wide as I look into his familiar smirking face and surrender myself back into him. This seems to be all the assent he needs as both hands move up to my breasts, eliciting a gasp from me. He goes to town, kneading my breasts and pinching my nipples between my fingers as I rock my ass back into his oh so hard cock.
Chuckling at his victory, Eli begins to slide one hand slowly down between the valley of my breasts and the dip of my belly button, his dark eyes never leaving mine, as if daring me to refuse him, to push him away — both of us knowing I never will.
As the warmth and pressure of his hand slides closer and closer to my pussy, I feel it start to pool with my wetness. Oh God, oh God, oh God. What’s happening here?! I can’t do this. He’s no good for me. He’s no good for anyone. Plus, I’m sure this is breaching some sort of clause or law. I mean, I’m their authority figure, for fuck sakes. I don’t trust my voice to say any of this though so I merely keep my eyes fixed on him. Not daring to move, hardly daring to breathe.
“Why don’t you let your dark side come out to play? Just this once,” he growls into my neck as his mouth grasps on to the crook of my neck. I actually moan for the first time in my life as my skin sets ablaze from his mouth, his delicious tongue. My body’s reaction catches me off guard for a second. I’ve never experienced such deep ravenous hunger for someone to be inside me before. His fingers push the waistband of my pajama pants and panties aside as the tips of his strong fingers come to rest atop the button of my clit. His other hand continues to alternately pinch and tease my left nipple as his fingers begin to do the same to my clit. With that I throw caution to the wind and push my tight little frame back into his encompassing one and lose myself to the sensation of his body. I feel an unfamiliar ache start to build deep in my lower belly. Is this the infamous orgasm I’ve heard so much about? I’m rocking my ass back into him as I ride his hand; I’m going to find out.
I catch sight of us in the mirror — him with a look of concentration I didn’t think he possessed and me with the face of a mad woman. Great staring eyes, a gasping mouth, and clawing hands grasping onto anything I can; the sink, my breasts, his hair.
“You want it?” he breathes into my ear.
I can only moan my assent as the pressure deep inside me begins to overtake me. Just when I feel blackness start to cloud my head, he pulls his hands free from my pants and places them back on the edge of the sink. Everything I’ve so far experienced in my 23 years hasn’t done an ounce to prepare me for the shock and emptiness I’m left with on his retreat. I look at him in hunger through the mirror, silently begging him to continue with me. That smirking face has grown even cockier, if possible.
“Say it. Beg for it.”
“Please…” I manage to plead.
“Please what?”
I glare at him as I continue to grind myself back against his steady frame. No matter how hard I push my ass up against that bulge in his jeans, he doesn’t budge. Fuck.
“Please fuck me,” I finally rasp. I don’t care how degrading I sound, how depraved I look. All I can think about is that cock, those eyes, his hands all over me.
It seems he had the same ideas as he snickers in victory and proceeds to violently push my pajamas and my panties off my hips and to the floor. He doesn’t return his fingers to my clit as I’d so hoped, but instead to the button of his jeans. Keeping his black eyes fixed to mine, he expertly undoes them and slides them down as well. I don’t even want to consider how many other girls he’s gotten into this position. I’m scared of the answer and sure he’d never tell me. I feel the bulbous tip of his cock being stroked along my pussy lips, up to the pucker of my asshole and then back down to my clit. Back up again.
“Condom,” I manage to rasp as the thought of all those other girls he’s had is still in my mind. To which he grins back at me in the mirror, reaches for the back of my neck, and shoves the length of his cock into me with one swift throttle.
“Holy fucking shit,” I curse as red-hot pleasure and pain mingle together. I’ve never felt anything like it before. I’ve never felt so alive. I think I may have even lost consciousness for a second, as the next thing I hear is a soft knock at the door.
“Poppy? Is everything okay in there?” comes another resident’s concerned voice from the other side of the door. "Oh shit," I think. If I didn’t trust myself to say anything earlier, I certainly don’t now. But I know I have to or he won’t go away. At least Eli locked the door.
Hunched over the sink there as Eli has his way with me, I manage to even my breathing a bit, not helped by Eli’s massive hands circling my waist and dragging me back into his domination of my tiny body.
“I’m okay, Tony. Just stubbed my toe. Thanks, though!”
With that, I hear him pad off down the hallway and Eli brings one hand to the base of my throat and yanks me up to him; his hard chest knocking against me as he continues his fucking.
“I knew you were a fucking slut.”
Oh god, those words bring me over the edge and that overwhelming pressure I’d felt building overtakes me and I collapse back into him, gushing all over his cock. This doesn’t stop his onslaught though, only seems to cheer him on. His hand grasps my throat tighter and I can barely manage to breath as he pounds away at my pussy until finally I don’t think I can take anymore. Releasing my throat and grasping my waist with both hands, I feel once last final thrust of his cock and he collapses down onto my back. We both simply balance like that for a moment, breathing there, me clinging onto the sink to hold me up and him lying atop me. I just can’t wrap my head around what just happened here, what I begged this man to do to me.
Pulling himself up, I glance up into the mirror again to see Eli doing up the button on his jeans. When he catches my eye, he gives me a quick slap on the ass, unlocks the door, and leaves without a word.
About the Creator
Little Wanderer
Independent scholar & world traveller
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