"My Husband Pays me for Sex"
And I bet you are jealous.
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My friend Lizzie was talking to me about sex, not something unusual. From the sex life she described, it was quite adventurous. Her husband had kinks and she had her fair share too. So, I was very surprised when she came out with the sentence "you know, he pays quite a lot".
"What do you mean?" I inquired, curiously. Surely, she didn't mean what I thought she meant.
"For sex," she stated. Her expression was neutral, we could have been discussing the weather. Completely dumbfounded, I gaped at her.
"He pays you for sex?" I quacked. "But you're married?" My brain tried to wrap itself around the words.
"Yes, we are married. But I still have my bills to pay and I still like pretty things. Sexually, he enjoys things I don't so it sweetens the deal for me".
Lizzie went on to explain that some of his kinks, including receiving anal, really did not appeal to her. In fact, they turned her off completely. "We can't do the things he enjoys in the bedroom because once they are done, I don't want anything sexual with him at all."
It made me think back to the times on the phone sex lines where men were talking about their wives and girlfriends not wanting anything to do with their kinks. In those situations, it may well have been that those significant others gave them permission to discuss things on the phone. Were they any different?
Come to think of it, through the phones, men had been paying me to fulfil them sexually for years. Was I any different?
Lizzie's husband had some very specific kinks, they involved dressing up, cigarettes and pegging. She loved the man more than anything in the world but she didn't smoke and giving anal turned her off completely. Without her being willing to fulfil his kink, something that he struggled without, he would be unhappy in their relationship.
Do we not all make sacrifices for our loved ones? My partner dragged me to watch the rugby a few weeks ago and he paid for the whole trip and my food and drinks. He did that because I didn't want to go. Isn't that the same thing?
Some of you will be horrified at the thought, but when you break it down, relationships are largely just transactions. He buys you three dinners, you call them dates, but if he is nice enough you are expected to sleep with him? (One of the main reasons I always bought my own dinner). Just another transaction.
She wouldn't tell me exactly how much he paid her for these "encounters" but indicated that it was enough to make it worth her while. "The more uncomfortable I am, the more he pays me".
Again, this made me flashback to the phone sex lines. I worked on a fetish line because they paid the most. Isn't everyone for sale if they are paid enough?
What would you NOT do for enough money? Where would you draw the line? Murder? Sex?
On a daily basis, don't we all get paid to do things we don't want to do? I don't want to get out of bed in the morning, but every morning I do because I have work. I work because they pay me.
Where would I be if I didn't need the money? On a beach somewhere. I think we all do something for money that we don't like to do. How is my friend getting paid to have sex with her husband any different?
It would definitely be easy to judge their arrangement harshly without thinking about it.
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