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I can’t tell you how long I’ve been in this place, I can barely remember last year let alone what must’ve been decades ago. Upload and all your dreams will come true, they said. Upload and you can control your own reality, they said. However, they didn’t say I would be trapped in my own hell by uploading myself into their mainframe. They didn’t say I wouldn’t be able to get out of this place. They didn’t say I was going to be the only “real” one here. I had to figure this out myself, but for the longest time I didn’t even realize it. In fact, I remember them specifically saying everyone who chose to upload would get to interact with each other whenever they pleased. I tried co-op mode with a few people who I knew before the upload, but something was off. I couldn’t put my finger on what it was exactly, but they weren’t the people I knew on the outside. Something about them changed. My brother wasn’t a murderer before this, my sister wasn’t obsessed with being idolized before this. If only he didn’t see the others here as just pawns to dispose of whenever he pleased, maybe if she didn’t want the others here to worship her at every moment, they would realize we are trapped here.
I stopped doing co-op mode long ago, but I will never forget the last time I did. My brother came to visit my simulation and took a knife to an NPC, Non-Person Character in the simulation. Adam was an innocent NPC, he was a kind, simple family man. I had only engaged with him a few times, but still said hi when I saw him around. No matter how much I knew the NPC’s weren’t real, I didn’t have the heart to hurt them. However, on the other hand, my brother stabbed him in the neck without blinking. He stood over him smiling, shearing at his virtual flesh. The blood spat from his neck as he grasped for life while my brother sat there and laughed. “Stupid bots, don’t you know your life is meaningless”, he said as he clenched Adam’s hair, pulling his head back. The horror on Adam’s face when my brother refused to break eye contact as he watched the life leave Adam still haunts me. I asked my brother why he did it, and he just smiled and replied, “because I wanted to, I can do whatever I want in here”. I know it’s just virtual reality, but I’ve never felt anything more terrifying and real.
I hadn’t initially realized this was a prison, in fact, I thought it was a utopia at first. It only took a few times of getting the same scripted response from an NPC to realize something was off with them, but I couldn’t tell if this was true for all of them. It took years to see that all of them were programmed and their behaviors were either programmed out right or dictated by an advanced algorithm. Despite this, the graphic interface was so realistic I couldn’t tell the difference between physical reality on the outside and this virtual reality simulation. When I first visited the Cyberop Enterprise headquarters for initial testing, I didn’t expect it to feel so real. They told me this was the essence of the simulation, a visceral experience indistinguishable from reality. I was sold on the idea of a utopia with the ability to live forever, do as I please, and BE anything I wanted.
I wasn’t perfect before this but maybe if my life wasn’t such a mess on the outside I would’ve chose differently. Maybe if I hadn’t lost my parents as a teen, granted I’m thankful they weren’t in this hell with me. My youth was taken from me as I raised my siblings the best I could. I didn’t resent anyone for this, if anything I still feel bad for introducing them to Cyberop Enterprise’s virtual reality simulations. These simulations used to be like an amusement park. We could just come and go as we pleased; however, the sensations were not as realistic. At the time these breaks from reality felt refreshing especially when the alternative was being an energy slave in the dystopian nightmare that waited outside. I just wanted a space to find peace for myself, a place for temporary solitude, not a permanent prison of my own doing.
That was until I saw her sitting across the bar from me. I came here to dissociate, my only peace in this hell, but I couldn’t take my eyes off her. It was rare to find a new NPC, I had found only a handful of them in the last year. Cyberop Enterprise said there would constantly be new ones but failed to mention that the new NPC’s would just be variations and copies of ones I already knew. She was different though; she was strikingly beautiful in a red dress with something indistinguishable around her neck. Maybe she was here to do co-op, visiting from her simulation, she just seemed too interesting to be another NPC. I took a shot of serotonin serum and made my way through the crowd to meet her. By the time I reached the other end of the bar, she was gone. Had I just imagined her?
I walked outside to smoke as the serotonin serum coursed through my system. It was an excuse to take a break from the crowds that dwelled within the club. The drinks couldn’t mask the fact that there was nothing new in the club. The same people, the same conversations, the same emptiness on repeat. As I drew the flame away from my face, I could feel a light touch on my shoulder. This light caressing of a hand moving across my neck reminded me of something. Something from outside of this simulation, something real. There was only one person I wished this hand belonged to, even if I had only seen her once.
As I turned around, the first thing I noticed was the golden locket around her neck. She was even more beautiful than I could see from across the bar. “I’ve never seen you here before”, I stated while doing my best to hold back the nervousness in my voice. She just placed her finger over my mouth, hushing me. She grabbed my hand and looked at me with those peculiar eyes which only attracted me to her more. She gave me a nod and clenched my hand tighter, leading me away from the club. As we walked under the canopy of streetlights, she remained eerily silent. Where was she taking me? Where was she from? Why wouldn’t she say anything? I didn’t care how strange all of this was, finally, it was something new. It was something that made me feel alive and real. Somewhere at the Cyberop Enterprise headquarters my body was floating in a tank, hooked up to countless wires, still and lifeless. However, my heart was still pumping and now I could feel it again. I had forgotten what this sensation felt like. She could be leading me to my death for all I know, but I would follow her immaculate beauty anywhere.
We reached the outskirts of the city when she let go of my hand and turned towards me with those eyes, eyes that could stop a train in its tracks, let alone a man. “We don’t have much time”, she said. “We need to move quickly”, she exerted as she grabbed my hand again. We began walking into the darkness of night as we left the lights of the city in our wake. The simulated stars above us began to shine brighter as the noise and city skyline vanished into the ether. Her gait seemed hurried as we walked for hours into the darkness of the woods. As we walked further into the forest, the brightness of the stars dimmed under the lush vegetation above. We walked until the brush made it nearly impossible to make out any features of what was ahead of us. The only thing I could see was an aura of moonlight breaking through a clearing up ahead. Once we reached the clearing she stopped again. I couldn’t take my eyes off her, but she was preoccupied looking through the clearing. I turned my head to see what she was fixated on, only to see a massive tree encapsulated by the moonlight. She turned towards me piercing my soul with her eyes placing her hand lightly on my face, kissing me before grabbing my hand, again, pulling me towards the tree.
As we basked in the moonlight under the largest tree I’ve ever seen, either in this simulation or before, she removed her golden locket from around her neck and placed it in the palm of my hand. Observing it closer, I could see that it was a golden heart and the locket was holding something surprisingly heavy inside, so heavy I nearly dropped it.
“This is the key to escaping this hell” she said.
“I don’t understand” I replied with a blank stare of confusion on my face.
“Follow me, I need to show you something” she replied.
She grabbed my hand and led me around the back of the tree where I could see an opening leading to an underground cave. Her hands encapsulated mine as I held the locket. As we faced each other in the moonlight, all I could think about was kissing her again.
“The only way to escape this simulation is to take this locket down into the cave there” she said.
Once again, my face was blank with confusion. “I’m not sure what you mean?” I replied.
“Deep in this cave there is an ocean of untouched water. There you will throw this locket into the water activating the crystal inside” she said with a more hurried voice.
“Is that why it is so heavy?” I noted.
“Yes, but that is beside the point. Only you can take this journey but once you do, you will be free. Once the crystal activates it will emit a signal that disrupts the coding of this simulation, bringing you back to your body on the outside.” She replied.
“Are you here for co-op? Do you work for Cyberop Enterprise? How can I know this will actually work?” I said more confused than ever.
“I can’t reveal these things”, she replied reluctantly. “I’m here to help you though and nothing I say will give you the answers you seek. Your answers are down there”, she said as she pointed to the cave.
“Will you go with me?”, I asked.
“Unfortunately, I can’t. This journey is yours and only yours. I will find you on the outside when you reach the waters and complete this.” She said while breaking eye contact.
“Where will I find you?”, I asked.
“I will find you, my love. You need to trust me; my time here is limited.” She replied as she gave me another kiss. I held her in my arms feeling truly content for the first time in my life. I closed my eyes basking in her love, only to open them and realize I was alone under the tree with the locket in my hand. Maybe she had vanished or maybe she never existed. I stood there staring into the void of darkness tunneling deep underground before me as I grasped the locket with all my strength. Whether this experience was real or not, I knew I couldn’t return to the city. I dreaded the life I left more than any unknowns I would experience in the cave. At least in this cave there was hope, hope that one day I could return to the real world, more importantly her. She made me feel alive again, she was my world.
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