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Verse 3: Am I Really Dying?
Will the misty master break me?
Will the key unlock my mind?
Will the following footsteps catch me?
Am I really dying?
Part 6
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12
Jake feels like a rock star. A rock star with stage fright. Adding to the butterflies on the dais are the butterflies now flitting around in his stomach. The cheers continue from the crowd of thousands. The wedding arch is only a few feet from where the platform landed, but Julia has done this before, Jake notes, as her slow walk is that of a professional. What’s worse is that her smile and hand wave are that of a politician. “Give me your vote, and I will do for you ONLY if you do for me, and ONLY if I feel like it. Aren’t I forgiving and merciful? Give me your money and let’s see how far I let it go.”
It turns Jake’s stomach and adds to the confusion of his feelings. He loves Julia, but he hates her. He will marry her just to betray her. He loves Gwen, but he hates her. He married her and had two children with her, only to betray her and threaten her life… twice. His body is dying. Will he accomplish his goal with an unknown outcome, or will he follow the fate of the other chosen ones who came before him? His stomach is full of butterflies and sour acid. The crowd cheers and whistles with joy. Their queen is finally going to get what she deserves, more power! What will they do when he betrays her… betrays them? Will I even be focused enough to betray her?
Another spasm, more intense, wracks Jake’s body. He stumbles, but just barely, and his breath is jolted from his lungs. Closing his eyes, Jake forces himself to take a breath. He must focus! He can’t let the events of the last few weeks be for nothing. Who knows, maybe he can convince Gwen to forgive him, if he survives? What will he be if he does survive?
Too much irony, thinks Jake. First, there was the irony of only being able to marry Julia in his wildest dreams… while dreaming. Then the irony of having to commit violence while hating violence. Then there was facing down imminent death in the form of a giant armadillo charging him, and him knowing full well that the beast was trying to save his life. Or playing the hero here in the Dream World while being a dangerous villain in the Waking World. Now, in a dream that has lasted weeks in the Waking World, but less than a day in the Dream World, he is having a moment of elongated time within the dream itself. But there are too many unanswered questions. And by the time Jake figures out those answers, it may be too late to do anything about them.
“Dearly beloved!”
The words are spoken suddenly and loudly. The bass threatens Jake’s eardrums with rupturing. He is brought out of his reverie with a start and lifts his eyes to the nine-foot-tall figure before him. Towering over the wedding arch, the man(?) reminds him of Lurch, from the Addams Family. But instead of a tuxedo, this guy is wearing long, flowing black robes. The sleeves flare dramatically, like a wizard’s robe. The giant’s face is mostly hidden by a hood and by the arch. Jake can, however, see the great, bulbous nose and the dark blue lips. The crowd behind them cheers profusely. The sound echoes through the great hall, threatening to tumble it down.
When the cheers end, Pastor Lurch continues, “We are gathered here today, not in the sight of God the Deserter!”
“The Absent God!” “Boo!” “God the Fearful!” “God the Abandoner!” “No God for us!”
“But in the sight of you, the great, ever-present dreamed and dreamers of this world! We are gathered here unite these two,” he gives a flourish of his hand to Julia and Jake as more cheers erupt from the crowd, “in the bonds of holy matrimony.” The word ‘holy’ is spoken as a drawn-out parody of its inherent meaning. This again brings cheers from the crowd. “This union, which is commended to be honorable among all men and women, all dreamers and dreamed, and all the dead; and therefore, is not by any to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently, discreetly, advisedly and solemnly. Into this holy estate these two persons present now come to be joined. If any person can show just cause why they may not be joined together, let them speak now or forever hold their peace.”
“He is the chosen one!” “It is meant to be!” “Down with Jeron!” “An end to Jeron the Enemy!” “Conquer Death!”
Julia turns her gaze from Pastor Lurch to him, her lips pursed once more in a smile of satisfaction. “You see, my beloved, they know your power and they sense my victory.”
Jake smiles back at her. Your victory?
“Marriage is the union of husband and wife in dreaming, waking, and dying. It is intended for their mutual joy and for the help and comfort given on another in prosperity and adversity. But more importantly, it is a means through which a stable and powerful environment may be attained.” More cheers reverberate in the hall at the word ‘powerful’. “Through marriage, our Queen, Julia Dream, and her King-to-be, Jake Chambers, make a commitment together to face their adversaries, embrace their people, realize their power, and conquer Death!”
The roar from the crowd is akin to the home ice hockey team scoring the game-winning goal as time runs out. Jake swears that it is so loud in the grand hall that it is, essentially, silent. This lasts for about ten seconds, he estimates, then the chants begin. “Jul-ya! Jul-ya! Jul-ya!” “Down with Jeron! Down with Jeron!” Jake sees Julia close her eyes and lean her head back, a wide smile is spread across her face. She is absorbing their energy, basking in the glory of devout praise. Eventually, the crowd silences. Pastor Lurch clears his throat.
“Queen Julia and Jake Chambers will promise one another to aspire to these ideals throughout their lives together through mutual understanding, openness, and sensitivity to each other. We are here today in spite of God the Deserter…” (Cheers!) “… because marriage is blessed beyond His most sacred wishes! All of you will bear witness to the joining in marriage of Julia Dream and Jake Chambers! This occasion marks the celebration of love and commitment with which this man and this woman begin their rule together. And now, through me, and in spite of Him, THEY join you together in one of the holiest bonds! Who gives this woman in marriage to this man?”
“We do!” screams the crowd in unison. And another cheer sends tremors through the great hall.
“This is a beginning for the World of Dreams and our inimitable Queen! With mutual courage, determination, power, and knowledge comes the affirmation of each one’s own purpose and their purpose together. Disciples of the Queen of Dreams! It is the moment of truth!”
Pastor Lurch reaches into the top of the wedding arch (He has no need to reach up because of his height.) and pulls out a simple crown. To Jake, it looks like a head-size version of a titanium wedding ring, prismatic sheen included. He certainly wasn’t expecting the crown of Charlemagne, but he had hopes that it would’ve been something less boring. Lurch hands the crown to Julia and she turns to him. He takes that as his queue to do the same. Your back will be to the portal, she told him. The thought brings on another spasm, or so he believes, and it pushes the breath out of him quickly. Jake’s vision becomes blurry, but he doesn’t need it to know that the butterflies have returned. Only the red and black butterflies take their places, but he can feel the tendril of a connection to the Waking World, and he knows the orange monarch is lurking. As he catches his breath, Jake meets Julia’s eyes. There is no concern in them, only a hunger. Hunger for power.
Behind Julia, Jake can see Helene, her wings barely visible from their rapid movement. To Jake, it reminds him of a hummingbird. Helene will stabilize the portal behind you, Julia had told him. He hopes that she will continue to stabilize it after his betrayal. Jake can also now see Kly, the Lord of Hosts, front and center above them, her host arrayed like a dome.
Julia holds the crown in her hands and raises it above Jake’s head.
Lurch speaks again, “Jake Chambers, this crown signifies your bond with Julia Dream, Queen of Dreams. Will you accept this crown as a symbol of her love and devotion?”
“I will,” he says, his voice flat.
As she lowers the crown, Jake sees her eyes blink almost too quick to notice. He knows it means something. What he doesn’t know is that the crown, now given permission to bind Queen and King, punctures each of Julia’s thumbs and absorbs her blood into it. A couple of moments later, the crown sits upon Jake’s head. He flinches as four small needles puncture his forehead, also absorbing his blood into it. Immediately, Jake feels spellbound. The bridge to the World of Death begins to open. Julia’s eyes flash a brilliant sapphire light as her power grows.
“By the power vested in me, beyond the reach of the Denied God,” says Pastor Lurch in a booming voice. “I now pronounce you Queen and King of the World of Dreams!” From beneath his robe the giant unsheathes a long, broad sword. He has come prepared for battle.
The world now seems far away to Jake. The blood spell from the crown has put him in a stupor, and he cannot focus his mind. I was never meant to be her equal, but her tool. Her slave. The thought jolts his mind as he mentally claws his way back to reality. The fire of his brewing anger tugs and then pulls at his awareness. But he feels the lifeforce being pulled from him, a flow of energy from him to Julia. She will bleed him dry to defeat her brother.
“Hello, sister,” says a sinister voice from behind Jake. “I see you’ve finally found yourself a suitable monkey to conduct your business.”
Jake can see blurs moving past him on both sides. They are the minions of death, and he hears a great cry go up within the grand hall. Like Pastor Lurch, the congregants have come prepared for wedding and war. The clashes create a rising clamor around him, but the voice of Jeron is clear as a bell.
“You have been desirous of my realm since time immemorial. But you know you haven’t the power to take it. Nor do you have the strength to defeat me. Only God the Deserter can give you the power to take me down.” It seems that even enemies are in agreement with their feelings about God. Then again, they’ve had millennia to become disgruntled about His disappearance. “Give me your best shot, sister.”
Jake can feel the power being drawn from him. Julia’s eyes light up once more, but brighter and more sustained. The same light begins to emanate from her hands. Around them, the violent and deadly battle rages. Then all slows down for Jake. Thanks to his spellbound stupor, Jake is having a kind of out-of-body experience. He sees himself standing, but slightly slumped. He watches as his head jerks forward and the breath is driven from his lungs. But something happens that he does not expect.
Jake perceives Julia’s drawing of his power as the flowing of an aura. But following the jolt, he can sense a new energy gathering within himself. He realizes that his time has come. And just as he funneled his dream force into the Waking World, he can see the vast pool of his life force waiting to enter the Dream World. It is the moment of his death. It is his time to strike.
Several things happen simultaneously. Jake slams himself back into his body and begins feeding off his life force. The bridge is immediately connected with the Waking World, and he can sense the bridge connecting the Waking World to the World of Death. The black and red monarchs take flight above him and are joined by the orange monarch. The three worlds are present together. As his body dies, Jake knows that his body is drawing power from the World of Death. In the Dream World, he is pulling power from the Waking World. Now, he must draw power from the Dream World into the World of Death. Just as he had done to Gwen, and to the psychiatrist, he shoots his left hand out and grabs Julia by the neck. The surprise in her eyes is priceless. Jake feels the balance shift, and he begins taking back his dream force from her. He also begins to take her dream force. Another vast pool of power. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out Harvey Wallbanger.
“Clear the way, boy,” he says quietly, but he knows the miniature animal can hear him.
Jake tosses the armadillo towards Jeron and the portal to the World of Death. As it flies through the air, it grows. Harvey lands at the border between worlds, a full eight feet tall and a force to be reckoned with. The beast begins tossing Jeron’s soldiers left and right, clearing a path. Jake sees him now. Julia’s brother.
He is tall and intimidating. Where Julia’s hair is long and white, Jeron’s is short and pitch black. Where Julia’s eyes are a bright sapphire blue, Jeron’s are a shining, sickly yellow. Where Julia’s skin is a soft, milky white, Jeron’s is a stark, ashen gray. He wears a simple outfit, though, a black turtleneck sweater, black slacks, and black wingtip shoes. Give him glasses and he could be the ghost of Steve Jobs. But Jake has no time to chuckle at his own wit.
Jeron trains his eyes on the scene before him. His army is holding its own, but the balance teeters. His sister, however, is not holding her own. She is being held in a choke hold by her “chosen one”. Of all the unsuccessful trials she’s gone through to try and usurp his power, her first success is her ultimate failure. Jeron locks eyes with the new King of the Dream World and smiles arrogantly.
“Fool,” he says, and begins to take a step forward.
Then a hand appears on his throat, his eyes become as big as dinner plates. From behind Jeron, Jake sees himself pop into view over Jeron’s shoulder.
“I’m dead,” Jake says to himself as he realizes that he’s looking at his soul. A smile appears on the Jake in the World of Dead, holding its king by the throat.
“I’m dreaming,” says Spirit Jake, the black monarch sitting on his shoulder. The aural flow of power begins from Jeron’s throat to his grasping hand.
13
Jake’s eyes opened with Doctor Allgeier and the Nurse Nancy standing over him. The doctor had just pronounced him dead. Jake’s eyes were a radiant emerald green. Nancy screamed and grabbed the sleeve of Allgeier’s lab coat. It was a collective scream that filled the room when the doctor and Gwen both realized that Jake wasn’t dead. Putting a finger to his lips and raising an open hand to the doctor and the nurse, he said, “SHH!” They both fell to the floor unconscious. He immediately turned his eyes on Gwen.
“Gwen, be quiet.”
She had never heard such command in his voice, and she silenced herself immediately. Jake got himself out of the hospital bed and tore the IV needles from his arm. It mattered nothing to him that his ass was hanging out of the back of his open hospital gown. Jake had expected to feel groggy and laden with pain. After all, he did die from kidney failure after shooting himself. But he quickly realized that his wounds were healed. He felt strong… youthful. He also felt a growing weakness. Dream Jake was channeling him. Spirit Jake was channeling Dream Jake. Real Jake, himself, needed somehow to channel Spirit Jake.
These thoughts had distracted him from noticing Gwen getting up from her chair and walking slowly to him. He flinched and blinked when he saw her right in front of him. Then he smiled. She was beautiful! He could tell she was hesitant, but wouldn’t you be if you were looking at your resurrected husband with shining green eyes? It was only a few moments of hesitation, though, then Gwen threw herself on him and hugged him tight. He repaid in kind, but he knew what he had to do. There was no king or queen of the Waking World. There was, however, a queen of his waking world. She was presently cutting off his oxygen supply with her embrace.
“Oh, Jake! I don’t care what happened, I don’t want you to die! Just promise me you’ll come back home and return to us! We need you!” Her words were breathless and genuine.
Jake’s heart began to break. He had thought that betraying Julia would be difficult, but it turned out to be surprisingly easy. Apparently, Jake didn’t love her like he thought she did. Gwen, though? He would never be the same after this. He brought his hands up to her shoulders and pushed her away. As the distance grew, Gwen cupped her hands on his cheeks, tears rolling down her own cheeks.
“Gwen… I love you! Can you ever forgive me?”
“I already have, baby!” The words came out slightly jumbled through her tears.
“Kiss me…” he told her quietly.
The kiss was the longest and most beautiful time of his life. He tried to drag out the moment as long as he could. But he could feel the aural power transfers beginning to slow in the other two worlds.
When the kiss ended, he said to her, “Forgive me.”
Before she could say another word, Jake had her by the throat. He extended his arm, pushing her backward. As her tears disappeared from the shocking turn of events, Jake felt his own welling up in his eyes. But he focused his thoughts on Gwen, not feeling the orange monarch landing on his shoulder. The aural power flow began, and his power continued to grow. He was in three worlds at once, choking three people at once. There was a pounding on the door. Jake looked at the door hurriedly and shushed. The people outside fell with a thump.
Gwen suddenly felt heavier. Jake knew that he was holding dead weight. Gwen was dead.
14
Julia suddenly felt heavier. Dream Jake knew that he was holding dead weight. Julia was dead.
Jeron suddenly felt heavier. Spirit Jake knew that he was holding dead weight. Jeron was dead.
15
Jake dropped Gwen to the floor, feeling empty. He was now existing in all three worlds at once. It was a strange feeling. Time passed equally in all three at the same speed. Jake was three separate entities, but he was a single one at the same time. He felt compartmentalized and knew it could take a very long time to navigate three realities at once. Stepping around his wife’s corpse, Jake reached for the door handle. It was time to go.
The bridges between the worlds were stable and permanent for Jake. He could channel any power from the other two if needed. Right now, he needed help from Spirit Jake. Can I become invisible, like a ghost?
He channeled the power of the dead. Had there been any eyes watching, they would’ve seen a human being vanish in a shimmer. Jake opened the door and made his way into the makeshift nursing station. He moved quickly to the wing’s entry doors and passed through them unnoticed. He was deep in thought and didn’t see the person sitting in a chair in the hallway. It didn’t matter, Jake was invisible.
“Daddy?”
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Anthony Stauffer
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After 3 Decades of Writing, It's All Starting to Come Together
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Comments (1)
Wow. Pretty deep