Burger Heist

“Put your fucking masks on!” he hissed. The two men in the front seat of the car did as he said. “Remember, no fucking names, I’m One, you are Two,” he said to the man in the driver’s seat who was slipping his ski mask over his head. “And you are Three, got it?” The man in the passenger seat nodded his reply. One noticed Two’s hands were shaking. He’d worked with Three before and knew he was solid but this was his first job with Two and this was already making him nervous. “Hey! Get it together goddamn it!”

The three men were in an idling sedan parked across the street from the R.M. International bank. The man in the back seat adjusted the black mask over his eyes, pushed his black cape back from his shoulder and pulled his large black hat lower onto his head. He racked the sawed off shotgun he was holding and said “Ok boys, here we go. Stick the fucking plan.”

The three men exited the vehicle and walked swiftly across the street to the front doors of the bank, all three holding their weapons at their sides as inconspicuously as they could. One’s black cape waved behind him. The trio bounded up the short set of steps and One took a couple running steps and kicked the front door in with such force the glass shattered as it flew in and bounced off the inside wall. An instant later he raised his shotgun and let off a blast just as everyone in the bank turned to see what had caused the sound of the door shattering. The two other men fanned out to his left and right. One shouted “GET ON THE FLOOR MOTHERFUCKERS! GET ON THE FUCKING FLOOR OR WE WILL SHOOT YOU IN THE FUCKING FACE!!!”

Two and Three, with weapons raised high, began shoving customers to the floor who were too stunned to take One’s direction. One made a quick straight line to the lead teller and leveled his gun squarely between the tellers eyes. With his other hand he slapped a large duffle bag onto the counter. “Fill it!” he said through gritted teeth menacingly. The teller, an older woman in a smart business suit, stood frozen, her mouth hanging open. Over the shouts of his partners and the sobbing from the customers being forced to the ground he leaned in closer and said in a perfectly normal voice, “Fill this bag or I will split your fucking head in half with this shotgun.” It was enough to snap her out of her trance. She immediately opened the drawer beneath her and started filling the bag. “Forget the nuggets! Just the burgers bitch!” She fumbled and started loading the duffle bag with hamburgers and cheeseburgers of all kinds.

One started moving down the line and repeating his demands to the other tellers, producing three additional bags. One by one the bags were filling and as One paced up and down the line a smile started to spread across his face. This was going just as he’d been planning. Then he heard something behind him, a scuffling sound. He turned around just in time to see Two bent down and trying to wrestle a weapon from a security guard who was on the floor. Just as he opened his mouth to tell Two to handle that shit the gun that the two men were struggling over went off. Both men froze for a second and then Two clutched his chest as blood came pouring from between his fingers and he dropped to his knees.

“What the fuck!” One said as he took three quick strides to where the two men were while working the slide on his shotgun and in a single motion extended his weapon until it met the security guards forehead, pulled the trigger and spun about and kneeled by a bleeding and motionless Two. “Shit,” he said. He scooped up Two’s shotgun and the guard’s handgun. “ANYONE ELSE FEEL LIKE A FUCKING HERO TODAY?” he screamed to the lobby as the red mist of the guard’s blood was still swirling in the air around him and settling on his black and white striped shirt. No one dared move. A customer on the ground close to him was whimpering.

He knelt down and rolled Two onto his side so he could check to make sure this dumbshit didn’t bring his wallet and ID with him to rob this bank when something caught his eye. He let him drop and with his free hand ripped open Two’s blood soaked shirt.

“THREE! Get the fuck over here!” Three did as he was told. “What the fuck is this?”

Three looked down to see a blood covered mini microphone and wire taped to Two’s chest.

“What?” Three whispered in disbelief.

“YOU brought him in. YOU vouched for him,” snarled One. Then he stood quickly and put his shotgun to Three’s forehead. Three recoiled but froze as One worked the slide on the shotgun.

“Hey man, what the fuck? I didn’t know this cocksucker was a rat!!”

One stared intensely at Three for several moments until he heard sirens in the distance. “Fuck!” he said and turned to look through the broken glass of the front door. Multiple police vehicles were converging on the front of the bank. Three saw his chance and pointed his weapon at One’s stomach. One, seeing the movement in his periphery turned and squeezed off a shell at Three, who shot at the same time. One’s shot went wide and hit Three in the leg. Three’s shot landed squarely in One’s stomach.

One took a step back and tripped over the whimpering woman laying facedown on the floor. He rolled around and got in a prone position facing Three using the woman’s body as cover, resting his gun across her back pointed towards Three. Three had assumed a similar position using the guard’s dead body as cover.

“You fucking rat!” One screamed as blood ran out of his mouth. “I can’t believe you fucking sold me out Grimace!!”

“I didn’t sell you motherfucker! I had nothing to do with that piece of shit!” Three yelled motioning towards Two’s body.

A loudspeaker from outside announced that the bank was surrounded and the gunman were to exit the building with their hands above their heads.

The two men seemed oblivious to the announcement. Locked in their standoff One racked another shell into the breach, “I fucking trusted you! You purple piece of shit! I let you in my home, you fucked my sister! This is how you repay me???” One screamed working himself louder and angrier as if by saying these things he was just now realizing their impact.

Three began to protest his innocence but was cut short by One firing a blast into the dead guard’s body just wide of Three’s position, spraying him with the guards blood and bits of flesh. The sound of the shot increased the urgency of the loudspeaker’s instructions. Three returned fire and his shot nearly severed the whimpering woman’s leg above the knee. The woman started screaming and managed to pull herself away from One and crawled toward the front door leaving a bloody trail that resembled a red carpet. Exposed, One tossed away his shotgun and pushed himself over to a leaning position against the teller’s counter. He pulled the handgun he had retrieved from the dead guard from his waistband and let loose a flurry of shots at Three. The bullets hit their mark and large pieces of purple flesh came peeling off of Three’s head. Three went motionless.

There was silence for a long moment. One caught his breath and pulled himself up on the counter. He made his way down and found the bag of hamburgers. He coughed up some blood as he grabbed the duffle bag. Loud shouting drew his attention to the broken front door in time to see a half dozen black clad police barreling through. His attempt to raise his gun had barely begun when the SWAT team’s bullets ripped through his body. His chest torn to shreds from a dozen hot bullets. His body slumped down and slid to the ground as the bag full of hamburgers slipped from his grip without him even realizing it. His vision went white. His last words escaped his lips barely even making a sound. “Robble robble.”