I Considered Myself Lucky Because My Mother Couldn’t Love Me

Feasting on: The Nature of Life Is Transitory by John Whye

Subtitle: Enjoy every moment of your time in the spotlight of being.

We all leave footprints in the sands of time. Life is many things, but it is never boring. There are so many threads to weave together to make up the tapestry of our lives. John Whye.

https://medium.com/illumination/the-nature-of-life-is-transitory-97c860acbed6

Yes, we all leave footprints in the sands of time. Sadly, some footprints can’t and shouldn’t be walked in, as they add pain to the followers and possess the power to destroy humanity.

These words tagged my heart.

But others were not so lucky and had the bad fortune to be raised by parents who were already damaged by their own caregivers.

My parents were damaged by their caregivers/parents and probably their parents were damaged by theirs too and many passed it on to their generation. My father didn’t show it and did the opposite of what was done to him. His father ignored him and didn’t support him. His mother raised him by herself, but he showed nothing negative about his past and he adored her.

His heart was bbbeeeaaauuutttiiifffuuulll. He never showed us cruelty or thoughtlessness. Looking back at my life, for the forty-four years I knew my father before he died, he never raised his voice at any of us, hit us, screamed at us, nor did anything negative around us. I see nothing sad or unkind behind me when I think of him. He showed us love. We learned about love from our father.

He was the opposite of my mother.

My mother couldn’t love any of her six children and her cruelty toward us had no boundaries or limits. She destroyed her children’s lives and left pain that hasn’t healed in more than forty years in my sisters.

They passed the pain and trauma they endured on to their children because they couldn’t heal. Our culture lacked the resources and ability to heal from traumas like this as the emotional state of children is never under consideration in my culture. I have nieces who have repeated their mother’s and grandmother’s mistakes and cruelty on their children continuing a cycle of hell for their generation.

Of the six of us, three of us, including me, did what my father did. We did the opposite of what was done to us and made our children’s lives better than ours.

I considered myself lucky.

Yes, John, I am lucky. I am lucky that my mother couldn’t love me. Because my father did, and his love transformed my life into something amazingly beautiful!

My life and my children’s lives are better because I did the opposite of what was done to me. I didn’t render hatred and cruelty for the hatred and cruelty that was done to me as a child. I refused to entertain it.

Looking back on my life, I know that the trauma is there waiting to victimize me.

#Iintend2survive so it has a lllooonnnggg wait ahead of the pain and hell it has planned for me because my father’s love is still carrying me.

I made damn sure that when my children look back into their lives, love, understanding, happiness, patience, honesty, forgiveness, strength, common sense, wisdom, kindness, endurance, positivity, good intentions, and all the resources required to create a better world for humanity.

Yes, in the process of fighting to prevent hatred and cruelty from consuming my body, mind, and soul, I endured pain and made many sacrifices, but it was worth it. I send change into our world through my children.

I gave my children something beautiful, strong, and positive to work with and from.

That, is success for me and every mother who did the same!

Cruelty and hatred must never be passed on to anyone or added to anything.

Our world can do without cruelty and hatred, but cannot survive without LOVE and KINDNESS!

Please, don’t render hatred and cruelty for the hate and cruelty humanity shares.

Let LOVE and KINDNESS be a gift you give to yourself daily.

Thank you for reading this piece. I hope you enjoyed it.