A Chef, Without the Line: Part 4
Part 4: The unedited thoughts of a chef who struggled with suicide and substance abuse, beginning a new life through music.
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PART 4 - I have booked my first show…
Before I get started with this weeks Story Part, here is my latest live mixing demo to fit this weeks topic.
I am coming up on my year anniversary for producing EDM music and mixing as a DJ, or better yet, a “Bedroom DJ.” I have mentioned in my previous parts I have always loved music and have wanted to pursue it as an interest of mine, but I never listened, followed, or challenged the idea that music is what my life is supposed to be.
I have decided to write about music for part four of my story and how I have grown in the last year producing and mixing, as well as what I have done to learn something I was completely foreign to.
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Numark Mixtrack Platinum
Exactly a year ago I purchased a Numark Mixtrack Platinum DJ Controller. I remember I sat on the idea for maybe an hour whether or not I should purchase what I thought was a pricey investment for something I might not pursue, or even could learn how to operate and it would be a complete waste of time and money. I honestly kinda said f$%k it and clicked pay.
The evening the controller arrived, I was pretty excited to just be at home and just mix. (LOL) I wasn’t mixing at all. I remember everything about my mixing was choppy, loud, distorted, and terrible; probably sounded like a pack of cats having their own “fight club” in the alley next to my house. The first few days, I was getting pretty annoyed with myself as I learned mixing was actually pretty difficult. I began to understand that “DJ’s” such as Jauz, Alison Wonderland etc all use pre-recorded sets during my research on “How To DJ” and there for did not DJ at all, but rather pressed play and stood on stage acting like an idiot. I couldn’t find many good tutorials that was a step by step process except from a VLOG series created by Laidback Luke (DJ and Producer) who has been mixing as a traditional DJ for many years.
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Laidback Luke
I began to watch LBL vlogs on how to DJ religiously. I would study his hand work, what knobs he was touching, loops and FX's he used, music he mixed etc, just so I could replicate it. When I was playing the drums back in 2008, I reached out to the drummer of the band "Action Action" Dan Leo. We had met him a few times prior to 2008 during some shows Action Action was playing in Colorado and because I won some pumpkin carving contests they held for Halloween. The band was great, (still in my top three of bands) and Dan was really into giving pointers and advice. Pretty cool and down to earth guy, not to mention number one drummer in my book. I remember emailing him on some tips for drumming and he recommend me to listen to “Violins” by Lagwagon; trying to replicate the rhythms and melodies of their drummer.
When I first started playing the drums in the early 2000s, I high jacked my father’s Ludwig drum set, secretly playing while he was at work. For some reason, he never wanted me to touch the damn set. I also jacked his books that were printed in the 1920s, and VHS tapes of this amazing drummer that had a step by step process on drumming, relating sounds to cymbals, snares and kicks to vocal sound effects made by the drummers mouth. Thinking about my dad and how he kept me away from the drum set reminds me of this basketball player whose name I cannot remember to save my life. The story of the basketball player goes: The father would play basketball and didn’t allow his son to touch or play but allowed him to watch. One day, his father intentionally left the basketball outside while the kid was outdoors playing, knowing he might pick it up. The son, not realizing the father was watching from inside the house, decides to pick up the basketball and play with it, all while the father knowingly entices the kid to pick the ball up over curiosity. The son grew up to be this amazing basketball player. Why the hell can’t I remember who this is? Cool story though. Anyways, maybe my father had intentions like that? Maybe not. He was kind of a dick about the drums.
Watching more and more of LBL tutorials, I began to relate drumming and sounds of drumming I made to producing and mixing music. A click of my tongue would be a snare, and a pop of my mouth would be a kick. LBL’s best advice for me was honestly just watching his In My Mind series and just listening to his mixes, replicated the sounds to clicks and smacks of my tongue while I mixed and produced. Like Dan Leo advised, to replicate sounds, kicks and rhythms, I began to do that with LBL demo set VLOGS. I downloaded every song LBL mixed and tried to mix them exactly how he would in his vlogs.
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Extremely Rare Heath Kirchart Skateboard Deck I Sold.
Weeks had passed and I was having fun. I stopped working a job, sold all of my prized collectable possessions, and a performance car I just finished building; and for twelve to fifteen hours a day, I would mix, mix, and mix. I had the neighbors call the cops on me numerous times for noise complaints (both day and night), people hated the loud music, scoffing at my street youth decisions as if I was selling nose candy to their adolescents, but I didn’t care. Every time I had self-doubt, which was a lot during my infant stages of mixing and producing, I would turn the music up, louder and louder and keep going, mixing no matter how tired I was or my hands hurt. I had times I wanted to stop, take a nap, or when I was angry and frustrated that I sucked major donkey balls, but I refused to believe I couldn’t do it and kept going, hours after hours. If I messed up during my “sets” of mixing, I would start completely over and redo the whole set. Whether I was a minute into mixing or seconds away from finishing and hour long set. I think that’s what progressed me rapidly into the skill as a traditional DJ mixing with transitions and mashups. I would break down and analyze every knob, fader, button or control on my controller as if I was the engineer building it and what each component did within the unit. I had to know everything about the controller and what everything did within it.
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Jauz
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Alison Wonderland
October 25th of 2018, I was receiving a new unit in the mail. A sexy Denon MCX8000. Ironically, this was the day I went to go see Jauz perform at Beta Night Club. I decided in order for my skills to progress, I needed to up my controller as well. I had mastered the Numark Controller but it was preventing my growth. I was a kid trying to go fast in a turbo charged Civic, when in reality I need a beefier vehicle that could handle the power and constant growth of performance. I had got my new unit in the mail and I was stoked I was going to see Jauz the same night, and amped I could see a professional DJ mixing; ever so excited to come home and practice mixing.
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Denon MCX8000 I purchased
Jauz was a huge disappointment and let down. My girlfriend and I had shoved our way to the very front of the stage, no more than twenty-four inches away from Jauz himself; anxiously awaiting some awesomeness. We were both excited to see him as we both thought he was and is a great producer; but in reality, a shitty DJ and nothing more than a button presser hitting play, utilizing every prerecorded set possible off SoundCloud... (now I am just being mean). During his set, my girlfriend and I kept noticing Jauz touching the back of the Pioneer unit, sliding his hand nowhere near any knobs, faders etc as if he was caressing the inside of a women’s leg. HE WAS NOT DJ-ING! He kept doing this, giving the impression he was mixing and actually working the decks, blending songs, doing mash ups, and transitions. He would touch knobs just to put his finger on them and have the poorly painted picture depicting him as a “DJ” and him as the Painter. When I mix, I do not touch a knob, a control or fader, if I do not need to. Doing so might allow me to make a mistake and fuck up; so I can call bullshit on his knob touching. There’s no reason for it or pretending your dialing in a transition. You look like a momo playing "pretend" as a kid.
Every transition, his hands were everywhere else but the deck, knobs and faders. He was more concerned about drinking Don Julio and getting shit faced and paid to get shit faced on tequila. I would relate Jauz like to going to McDonalds expecting great results, thinking a real chef is cooking your food in the kitchen when in reality, its all PREMADE FROZEN CRAP. Sorry McDonalds for the analogy and comparing you to Jauz... I do love your fries doh. :)
Jauz is a great producer, but not a DJ nor a performer. I’ll always remember that night when I looked at my girlfriend at the Jauz concert and she whispered into my ear, “You already mix a million times better than Jauz.” It boosted my confidence and gave me a renewed vigor that I was doing what I was meant to do, no matter how hard it was and times I wanted to give up. We left maybe forty-five minutes into his set, really disappointed in the fact we wasted the time, energy, and money to pay a professional for what we thought was a real talent and skill.
I drove an hour and a half home, the whole way thinking, kinda frustrated at the night. But it fueled my fire. I woke up the next morning determined I would mix better than Jauz and everyone that is faking it until they make it. I am really far from being the best. I still think I personally suck, hence why I haven’t placed myself in front of people and mixed live. I’m personally holding myself back, fucking scared, but I had a DJ friend help me get over my fear of DJ-ing in front of people. My girlfriend constantly tells me I am ready, always critiquing songs I produce or my live DJ mixes, knowing that they must be better then professionals and graded on the same scale if not higher and harder than professionals. She tells me "If you want to make it, you need to be better, better than yourself, better than them and better than the next."
Now, I am mixing in front of people in a few weeks and I am nervous as hell. But I think… know I am ready.
P.S.—I am not trying to hate on “DJ’s” such as Jauz and Alison Wonderland, they have faked it to a point and have made it as a sell out faking the trade and art of mixing. But the shouldn't call or label themselves as something they're not. These people make a shit ton of money faking it and they should use that money to have a skilled professional teach them how to master the trade. I think LBL even offered to train Jauz or teach him a few years before I saw Jauz live... hmmmmm.
If I wanted to watch someone fake it during a performance, I would buy a hooker and do her. In honesty, no matter how shitty I think these people are as fake DJ sell outs, I still have to be grateful that they have inspired me to push harder, always critiquing my skills to master this trade. There are many more people way skilled and qualified than I am getting taken out of the spotlight they have deserved for years because of “artists” like these fake DJ’s killing the trade, and Like Diplo said, “Sadly I am a part of it.”
If you're going to sell out, master the trade and sell everything about yourself, knowing you earned it over the long hours, hard work and dedication. When do you see Tony Hawk faking a kick flip with CGI, or an Olympic swimmer using a motorized flotation device. They're on Wheaties boxes for a reason and thats the best way to sell out.
About the Creator
SKEDDY OFFICIAL
I was once a chef and I hated it, now I'm on a mission to find happiness with music... Here is my story of being a chef and why I left to produce music and DJ. I'm on Soundcloud and Insta too. Read my story at skeddy.world
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